To China With Love - adoptingalice

This will be my last post from China.  We leave very early in the morning for our flight to Shanghai and then on to Chicago and home.  We are 31 hours door to door so we plan to finish packing soon and get a good night's sleep.

Yesterday we took the official oath at the American Consulate.  It was very emotional and I was quite the mess during the whole thing.  I was especially moved by all of the American families adopting special needs and older kids.  It was so moving to see these new families for children who would otherwise spend their lives in an orphanage in China.  I was so grateful for Alice and that God placed her safely in my arms.  This kid and I are going to make a great life together.  What a gift, what an awesome gift. 

After the oath we went shopping on Shamian Island and then dined at a Thai restaurant, "The Cow Bridge."  It was very good but I have learned that having a baby in tow does not allow mom much time to dine.  Nine month olds are very demanding. 

Dinner tonight was very special.  Our last with our travel group - the most wonderful people who have shared this journey with Alice, mom, and I.  It is hard to believe that a mere 10 days ago we were strangers.  Today I consider each and every one of them dear and trusted friends.  Leaving is so bittersweet.  I will miss them so much.  We are making plans to reunite at Disney World or on a Disney Cruise in the not so distant future.  I sure hope we make that a reality.  The children of this group seem like sisters to Alice and I know I will do my best to maintain these bonds.

So, goodbye China . . . . . and thank you for my daughter. 

 

We have been very busy with taking care of baby and going on tours throughout this beautiful region.  Last evening we went on a dinner cruise of the Pearl River.  The city lights reflected beautifully on the river and the huge bridges were all lit up for the upcoming Chinese New Year celebrations.  Wherever we go, this group of Americans with Chinese babies in tow, we get stares and comments.  The Chinese are not shy about touching the babies or straightening their clothes or letting us know they are not dressed warm enough.  Overall, the Chinese people are warm and engaging though they have learned to survive as one among millions in these very crowded and bustling cities.  China's cities move at an incredibly fast pace and the noise is deafening.  Even in the stores, the music is set on "blast your ears off."  After a day of being out and about, we are always grateful to return to the quiet of the hotel.

We have our American Consulate appointment today.  This is an oath taking ceremony where we declare that we will never abandon this child.   All of the paperwork is finished and Alice will receive her visa to travel to the U.S.A.  The minute the plane lands on the Chicago tarmac, she is a citizen.  Yippee.  Thank you to everyone for your prayers concerning the paperwork.  As Carol said, God has it all taken care of.  And He did and I am grateful. 

We are homesick and glad that our departure day is Friday.  I just want to get home and start life with this child.  I miss the sights, sounds, smells, and routines of home.  We are traveling from Guangzhou to Shanghai to Chicago to Wichita.  The only part that worries me is the Shanghai stop.  We are on our own at that airport as our agency rep parts ways with us in Guangzhou.  Please pray that we make it through security and immigration without problems and that the luggage plus the baby are not too difficult to manage.  I can't wait to see everyone - family, friends, and pets.

 

Love to All,

Sandy

We had planned to go to the park today but the rain came hard and heavy this morning and our little jaunt was cancelled.  So mom and Alice and I just strolled about inside the hotel and to some nearby stores along the main boulevard.  We found a few items - a traditional Chinese outfit for Alice and some small gifts for friends at home.  We lunched at Starbucks (so daring) and took an afternoon nap.  We are planning a quiet evening of reading, maybe a movie, and, of course, playing with Alice.  She has been out of sorts today and may be getting a bit of a cold.  I hope not.  It is getting close to time for bath, bottle, and bed for Miss Alice.  Mom and I have noticed that Alice draws quite a bit of attention from the local Chinese.  We are constantly stopped so that they can look at her, ask her age, and comment on her beauty.  Many have said, "You got lucky."  Of course, we agree.  I hope everyone is well at home and that the snow is not too deep or the temps too cold.  I can't wait to get home and see everyone.  I miss my family, friends, pets, and home.  Only 5 more days.  Please continue to pray for us - that Alice's visa is granted without difficulty, that we stay healthy, and our return travel is safe. 

 

Love to All,

Sandy

The past 2 days have been a whirlwind.  On Friday we flew from Nanchang to Guangzhou.  It was a short flight but with all of the airport security and getting to and from hotels in these very large cities, it seemed to take the whole day.  Alice handled the flight just like she handles everything else, with complete acceptance.  She is the most laid back and sweetest little thing.  She just goes along and makes the most of whatever comes her way.  Guangzhou is an amazing city.  It is built along the Pearl River and has a climate and landscape similar to New Orleans or Savannah.  The city has wide lovely boulevards, lined with ancient trees, and even Spanish moss hanging from the oldest and largest.  Today we went to Shamian Island, a short drive from the hotel and across a bridge, to get the medical exams done on the babies.  The examination center was really quite unbelievable - like being in a hospital of the 1920s.  The ear exam was done with a little rattle and if the child turned her head - well, perfect hearing.  Since Alice didn't respond at all and passed anyway, I had to wonder just how one could fail such a test.  I'm not complaining at all since passing the medical is just one more hurdle we have cleared on the long road home.  After all of the babies in our group passed their exams, we all went shopping.  Shamian Island is a very unusual place.  It is comprised of old European architecture - truly exquisite.  It was built during the occupation and served as home to the British gentry and military officers.  Mom and I loved everything about Shamian Island and the group is planning a shopping day to the island this coming week.  Our group ate at a local Cantonese restaurant for dinner tonight.  According to our guide, Simon, it is one of the best in the city.  Well, I was not prepared for this venture at all.  We walked about 20 minutes to get to the restaurant and upon arriving, had to pass all of the live animals being served that evening, sitting in cages at the entrance.  There were crates of snake, lizard, bunny rabbits, ducks, fish, etc.  Even an alligator or two.  I was horrified and grateful that our table was a long distance away.  I will ask more questions in the future before agreeing on a dinner date.  The coming week holds many more appointments to complete paperwork and some great sight seeing.  The most important thing is the time I am spending with Alice.  She is the love of my life.  Sweet, funny, vulnerable, brave - all at the same time.  Mom is a goner, truly head over heels and Alice feels the same way.  Every day is a surprise as we watch this child grow in trust and become willing to share more and more of her precious self.  Such a gift.

The past 2 days have been very mellow.  The weather here is rainy and chilly and we have opted to stay at the hotel rather than take Alice out in the weather.  We did spend a few hours at a museum this morning and learned a lot about the customs and history of Jiangxi province, the home of Alice's birth.  Other than that, we have stayed in.  This time is a gift - we are getting to know eachother and each day that passes reveals more of the personality and character of this amazing little girl.  I search her face and she searches mine.  Sometimes I look over at her and I catch her staring at me with such a questioning look on her face.  I guess only time will teach her that I am in for the long haul , her forever family. In just 4 days she is already rolling over from back to belly and is starting to exercise her limbs while she lays on a blanket.  She is quite the food horse and is most impatient for the spoon to get to her mouth.  She is eating well and sleeping the whole night through.  I feel so fortunate that Alice appears healthy, happy, and well adjusted.  I am forever grateful to God for this precious gift, He has knocked me off my feet and I hope I never recover. 

We are traveling with 4 other families, all who received their babies on the same day that we received Alice.   What a wonderful group of people to share this experience with.  They are so supportive and understanding as we are all, essentially, in the same boat.  It has been so fun to watch each baby thrive under the loving care of these new parents - so many positive changes in so few days.  No need goes unanswered and there are offers of medicines, diapers, food, formula, or whatever is needed whenever it is needed.  We ate dinner tonight at a nice little Italian place called Cafe Roma, owned by an American ex-pat from San Antonio.  Great food and atmosphere and just a nice, laid-back evening for everyone.  Alice crashed the minute we got back to the room.  I am about to follow. 

I do want to mention how much mom has helped on this trip.  She has always been supportive of this adoption and now she helps with bottles, cereal, diapers, or whatever else comes along.  She is full of sage advice, having raised 6 kids of her own.  We are both so anxious to get home but are making the most of our time here.  Alice loves her Nai Nai already and seems to enjoy making her laugh. 

Good night from Nanchang.  Tomorrow we travel to Guangzhou, the final leg of our China journey.  And then home - Yippee.  The majority of the paperwork is done in this last leg and it is the portion of the trip I am so anxious about.  Some little glitch in paperwork can cause such nightmares.  Please pray that this all goes smoothly and that we receive Alice's Chinese passport without delay. 

 

Love to All,

Sandy 

It has been chilly and rainy the past couple of days.  Despite the weather, our little group of families ventured out in order to visit the city's famous pavilion and park.  The site was lovely with traditional architecture and detail and a short but sweet performance by Chinese musicians. 

I dressed Alice in her ginormous snow suit even though the temps weren't that low.  I didn't want a public scolding for having any baby skin exposed to the elements.  Alice hates being bundled up and has learned that she's a "let it all hang out" type of girl. 

I also learned something today about cultural differences.  Again, I have read this before but didn't realize it referred to one so young.  Our local guides, Mary and Elsie, came to our room today to discuss our departure time for the pavilion.  I mentioned that Alice was constipated and, despite copious amounts of prunes, had had no activity in that area since I received her.  Mary told me that babies in China do not poop in their diapers but rather in the toilet.  She told me to just sit her on the toilet and kind of grunt at her and she should take care of business.  I assumed the grunt was kind of a verbal cue, like in behavioral training.  I thought, hey, I can do this.  I tried it and Alice just screamed bloody murder.  Back to diapers.  When we got home from the pavilion Alice would not stop grunting and crying.  Mom told me to try the toilet again.  I did and Alice was a big girl and did her job.  I was amazed.  She is 9 months old, very developmentally delayed, can't roll over or sit up, but she is toilet trained.  Who would have thought?

 

 

I meant to mention this yesterday but forgot.  After receiving a child in China, the first 24 hours are referred to as "the harmonious period."  This is an adoptive parent's chance to address concerns or issues that may prevent the adoption from proceeding.  At the official notary interview following this period, the official asks this question of each parent, "Are you pleased with the child, do you like her?"  I have read about this process but had no idea how it would affect me.  "Are you kidding me?  Do I like her?  Just try to take this baby from me, anybody, I dare you."  That is how I felt.  I actually behaved quite differently and started crying right in front of the "high ranking government official."  I said, "oh yes, I love her, she is my daughter."  The official, bless her heart, just smiled and nodded at me, and stamped my relationship with Alice as official.  And that is how we became mom and daughter.

 

We had a very busy morning.  Several official appointments finalized the adoption in China and we applied for Alice's passport that allows her to travel with me to the U.S.  This won't be ready until next week and we will receive it when we travel to Guangzhou.  Our last stop this morning was Wal-Mart.  I don't shop at American Wal-Marts but I had no choice in China.  It was overwhelming.  Two stories high, super crowded, loud music, weird sights and smells.  We are quite a curiosity and get lots of stares and are even followed by some.  Alice was an angel and despite being hot, tired, and hungry, never made a peep.  This is not necessarily a good sign.  It may mean that she has no expectation of having her needs met. I am teaching her that she can turn to me and I will take care of her.  Alice's little personality is starting to emerge.  We saw some grins and smiles this afternoon.  She smiles with her face all squinched up and looks a lot like Edward G. Robinson, only cuter.  She is starting to notice when I leave her visual space - a very good sign. 

Alice is finally in my arms.  So sweet and precious, words cannot express my wonder and gratitude.  I'm overwhelmed with the responsibility of it all.  She is going to survive despite my clumsy efforts.  I've been struggling a bit in how to prepare a bottle but I think I'm starting to get the hang of it.  Alice cried very hard for the first hour.  She would look at me and just burst into tears anew.  It broke my heart yet at the same time I understand.  Her entire world has been turned upside down and all of the familiar comforts, sights, sounds, and smells are gone.  She is lost and all she knows to do is cry.  After about an hour she began to study her new surroundings, following all movement and sound.  Long looks into our faces.  While she still has the "deer caught in the headlights" look, she is calmer, has taken a bottle, and at this moment, is sleeping soundly in her crib.  She is a sweet and precious angel.  I never thought this day would come.  And I am so appreciative of all of the prayers and support that friends and family continue to provide.  Please continue to pray for our remaining time in China and a safe journey home.

 

Love to All,

Sandy, Margie, and Alice

It is 2:00am in China and I have not slept a wink all night.  I cannot begin to process all that we have experienced thus far and all that is about to happen.  Today I meet Alice Xiao.  This day is the culmination of 5 years of dreams, hopes, and prayers.  To be so close to the realization of motherhood overwhelms me.

I really do not have words to express it.  But this I do know - God has been faithful from the very beginning.  He has heard and answered every prayer.  He has brought me to this place and He stands with me now.  How can the day be anything but glorious.  

 

Sandy

 

 

 

Mom and I had a nice day today touring about Beijing.  We saw Tianeman Square, the Forbidden City, and the Great Wall.  We also got a quick drive-by view of the Bird's Nest from the Beijing Olympics.  We enjoyed an excellent lunch of local cuisine including duck, the specialty of the restaurant.  I have met so many wonderful people from all over the U.S.  They have all been on this same journey of waiting and waiting for the referral of a child.  It is still hard to believe that in less than 24 hours we will all meet the children we have been dreaming of for so long.  We have a short plane ride to Nanchang at 6:00 am and, after settling in at the hotel, we meet the babies.  Please continue to pray for us - that our meeting goes well and that I do what is needed to help Alice during this very difficult transition. 

 

Love to All,

Sandy

We finally made it to our hotel in Beijing.  One of the longest days of our lives.  Not horrible - just long and tedious.  Oh yeah, and airplane food - it's pretty awful.  This evening is for a long, hot shower and some relaxation.  Breakfast is at 6:00 am tomorrow and then the Great Wall, Forbidden City, and Tianeman Square.  No pictures today but I will sure have some tomorrow. 

Take care,

Sandy

Well, we are packed and on our way.  Karen came over and helped us fit everything into 2 suitcases, 2 carryons, and 2 purse/diaper bags.  Little Alice Xiao - we are coming.  Everyone please pray for safe travels.  Next time I post I will be in Beijing.  Woooohooooo.

It has been a crazy month and a half since receiving Alice's referral from China.  The final countdown is fast approaching.  Only 5 more days and mom and I board the plane for the long flight to Beijing.  In one week I will have sweet Alice in my arms.  There is still much to do to prepare for the trip, wrap up business at the zoo, and arrange for the care of my home and pets while I am gone.  I am thrilled but quite anxious at the same time.  Will she like me?  Will I be a good mom?  Am I crazy to be doing this at my age?  Well, it's too late now and I am confident that God has had this in his plans all along.  Sometimes he takes a loooong time to answer prayers.  But he is faithful and my gratitude knows no bounds.  I can't begin to thank everyone for the support I have received in the past months.  Karen has been tireless in her efforts to help me - shopping, books, advice, food, meals in my freezer upon my return.  Penny and Mike are taking us to the airport and picking us up very late on the night of our return.  Brooke and Charlie brought loads of baby supplies to my home and Brooke has called with advice and pediatrician referrals.  Mom has been my ongoing 4 year support - never failing to dream right along with me.  Kathy and Deb and Joni - ongoing daily support and prayers and excitement.  I am so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life.  I cannot wait to bring Alice home so that she can learn what friends and family are all about.  Thank you everyone and please continue to pray that we have a safe journey and everything that needs to get done will get done in time.

 

Love to All,

Sandy

 

2/16/2010 8:09:28 PM - 000070335042
More photos - but with Alice in her new home:) I'll be in Salina next month. Making a special trip to see the little one!

2/7/2010 6:26:40 PM - 003016627739
Sandy-We are all so excited that you will be home soon. It will be thrilling to welcome Alice when it is time. Gus and company will have a big surprise and will be so glad to have you home that they will adjust quickly. Many prayers for the paperwork departmemt. You should go through without a hitch. Love and see you soon, Joni

2/6/2010 2:33:49 AM - 003018405579
So excited for you! Praying for your family!

2/5/2010 2:11:04 PM - 003017396905
Sandy- It is so exciting to hear the news and see the pictures of your daughter! I am very happy for you and appreciate the blog that allows us to share your joy.-Mark Brown

2/4/2010 11:01:01 PM - 003017890806
Sandy - I am rejoicing with you and for you!! She is a beautiful little girl. I am so thankful that the day has finally arrived.
Blessings my friend, Connie H

2/4/2010 7:03:14 PM - 003016627739
Sandy, Marge and Alice. I am so thrilled for all of you. I was so glad to hear that Alice is eating well and sleeping through the night! How great is that? I'm also glad you have had some down time with the weather to stay in and relax and get adjusted (and rested too I hope.)Thank you for the wonderful updates so we can follow along. Will be praying for all of you through this last part. I hope everyone is holding up well. Love, Joni

2/4/2010 2:36:54 PM - 003017806834
Sandy, Margie, and Alice,
Thank you for sharing all the beautiful pictures. What wonderful new families! I am so glad that you have someone there to share your experience with. Praying for the last leg of your journey in China to go smoothly. May God continue to hold the three of you in the palm of His hand. I love you all!
Penny

2/3/2010 9:54:48 PM - 003017976002
Oh Sandy!! I am so excited for you. She is soo cute. my eyes tear up as I type these few words to you. it is amazing to see God at work in her life and yours. 5 years sounds like a long time to wait yet it is just the perfect time according to God. I can not wait to hold her on my lap and see her close up. I absolutely love babies!

Love ya,
Penny Beans

2/3/2010 2:42:21 AM - 003017764758
AAAHH, she is SO precious! What a lucky little girl to have you all as her new family! Love looking at the pics and am so happy for you !!! Can't wait to meet her!

2/1/2010 6:46:47 PM - 003016627739
Dear Sandy, I was so excited to see my comment FINALLY posted that I had to get on and try another. I have sent messages daily but they do not show up. You are SO loved by so many and a truly great friend. Thanks for all you did in my recovery! The kids are as excited for you as I am in looking forward to your return. Thanks for the great updates and we know there will be so much more to hear when you return. I continue to pray daily for all your needs and safety. Love you so much!!! Joni
P.S. You know where your closest sitter is when you need one and it is time.

2/1/2010 4:11:11 PM - 003016552756
Sandy
I am so happy for you. I remember those first few days that all it took was just one little smile and you knew your daughter was starting to show you that it would all be OK. I can't wait to see pictures of you together, now what you are offically a family. Have a great time. Gracin and I are praying for you all. Kiss Alice for us.
Traci jo and Gracin Ann

2/1/2010 2:10:21 PM - 003016627739
Dear Sandy, one of these days my comments will post. Can't wait to see all of you home safely. Alice is blessed to have you as her mother. Love, Joni

2/1/2010 3:39:45 AM - 000070335042
Hey, we want to see photos of you WITH Alice. I know Grandma isn't the best photographer, lol, but give it a shot!

2/1/2010 3:33:10 AM - 000070335042
*Crying* Soooo excited for you. Love her already. Jennifer

1/31/2010 10:43:53 PM - 003016580651
Oh Sandy, she is beautiful. What a precious sweetheart! Mom and daughter together at last - what joy you will share in the years to come. Congratulations and God Bless to both of you. Her MOSTEST favorite aunt cannot wait to hold her. My prayers continue you for Grandma, Mom and Daughter!

1/30/2010 11:21:55 PM - 001070309622
Sandy, I am so glad that you are about to hold your baby girl soon! I can't imagine the rush of emotions! We are continuing to pray for you and cannot wait to meet sweet Alice for the first time!! Hugs from MN!!!

1/29/2010 2:22:49 PM - 003016580651
Forgot to mention how much Alice is going to love her grandma. Mom, you are the best and she is blessed to have you, too. Enjoy your newest grandbaby!!!
Love to all,
Denise

1/29/2010 2:19:19 PM - 003016580651
Sandy and Mom, so glad you made it. You were on my mind and heart all day. It is thrilling to think that after all these years, your little girl will be in your arms tomorrow. I am so happy for you and Alice. She is so very blessed to have you as her mom. I can't wait to see you with her. Enjoy your sightseeing and know that all three of you are in our prayers. Love and Blessings!
Denise

1/27/2010 3:14:56 PM - 003016552756
Sandy
Can't wait for Gracin and Alice to meet. All mothers have the same scared feelings, no matter how God brings our children into our lives. Gracin and I will continue to pray for safe travel. Have fun with your new daughter. God Bless-Traci jo and Gracin

1/26/2010 3:12:45 PM - 003016636510
Sandy, I have enjoyed sharing your journey to get beautiful Alice! What a big wonderful, loving family she is going to have for the rest of her life! You are a "natural" Mom (you even got my napkin the other day at lunch! SEE!) Look at how you nuture all your relationships-human and animal in your life! Alice will be learning all this from you. Welcome Baby Alice!!! I can't wait until you are home safe and sound and you bring her to the zoo for the first time! Have a safe and exciting trip you two...i mean three!! :) Love, Deb

1/26/2010 12:07:05 PM - 003016534885
We are all so excited for you in our WOW group. We can hardly wait to pass her around at a baby shower. She is sooo cute!
God Bless you in your travels. Love you, Martha

1/26/2010 3:54:24 AM - 003016732346
HEY BUD (DEEP SCRATCHY VOICE)
Alice looks adorable. We can't wait to meet her. Sandy, I'm really happy for you and love Alice already. Every time I think of you guys being together soon, emotion overtakes me. We'll be praying for your trip. Love, Mike

1/25/2010 1:42:23 PM - 003016914610
I can't believe after waiting all of these years, you are nearly ready to meet your beautiful daughter. I am so happy for you. You are going to be such a wonderful mommy. I can't wait to meet Alice! I'm praying for all of you. Have a safe and wonderful trip. I can't wait to hear all about it. Love, Kathy

1/25/2010 3:44:49 AM - 002031663059
Sure wish I could be there to help you at the farm, Sandy! I'll be covering you with prayers for the trip. Get ready to discover a God-given love that will surpass your understanding of it! Blessings, Carol T

1/24/2010 7:27:02 PM - 003015799929
Three weeks and I will get to hold my new niece in my arms. I am so excited! I only hope that I am as good of an aunt to Alice as Sandy always was to my 3 kids. When they stayed with her when we went out of town, they usually didn't want to go home with us. They have so many great memories with Sandy, I hope to have the same opportunity with Alice. By the way, it's pay back time. You will soon be the proud owner of a 'Hermit Crab'. Have a safe and fun journey and I can't wait to see you when you all get home! Love, Karen