Life with the Cobbs - Journal

Lately, Lauren has taken to doing something, and then swiveling around to make sure I've seen what's just happened. Maybe she has scooted/crawled across the floor, and wants to make sure I've seen her accomplishment. Other times, Jackson has taken a toy away, and she looks for me to then pout her little lips and try to get back what she wants. She is seeking affirmation and security in her mom, and every moment is an opportunity to reinforce her value and help her to grow (even if it's ultimately not what she was after). Regardless of her motives, whatever the circumstance she looks to me or Matt for approval and help every time.

We should all be doing the same. I don't always have it right, and maybe I sometimes go at things the wrong way, but my heart and my focus should always be turning to Jesus. Lauren finds her joy by pleasing her mom and dad, and measures her approval through our affirmation and affection. God wants us to do the same thing with Him, our Father. Everything we do should be measured in Him. Our worth should be found in Him.

I'll admit that it's hard sometimes not to scoop Lauren up every time her bottom lip curls and her baby blues fill with tears when something doesn't go her way. Same thing with Jackson. I'm glad God helps us parents along the way! Plenty of hugs and encouragement are needed on both fronts. My ultimate goal and aim is that both Jackson and Lauren will grow up knowing absolutely that God loves them and understand that Jesus gave up his life so they can be with Him forever. I believe the best moments in my life, besides my own salvation, is when they will choose to follow Jesus.

I'm definitely looking forward to celebrating, along with the angels, on those days!

At the end of the book of Psalms is a smattering of songs about expressing praise to the Lord. Each psalm extols the amazing provision and virtues of God Almighty and the authors seem to not be able to contain their love and adoration for their Healer, Sustainer, Creator and Savior. When you read these psalms, it is difficult not to be uplifted and your heart not to beat faster and in tune with the joy of praising God. Praise is infectious.

This morning, on the rare occasion my children are somehow still sleeping at 7:30 a.m., I have been thinking about how my primary love language affects the ways I naturally praise God. I am a "words of affection/affirmation" person, and so words matter to me. This is why when I read these psalms, my heart and soul connect and I begin to praise, too. I express love to God through my writings, through my reading, through my words and even through my songs. And, in other areas where my "love language quotient" is low (like gifts and acts of service), I have to really work to love God. For some people, "doing" is how they love. For others "being there" is how they primarily love. Each of us naturally express love in certain ways because of the way God created us. And, He continues to stretch us in other areas so we are constantly growing in our love for Him.

How do you tend to express love to God? Where does God want to help you grow? These are all opportunities to praise the God who loved us first and loves us best.

It is hard to believe that summer is coming to a close. Time is such a relative term anymore! This week we realized that neither child has clothes for fall/winter because they've grown so much. Lauren continues to be at the top of her age bracket in height and weight. She's now wearing 12-18 month clothing at 7 months! She is such an adorable little girl, with such engaging chatter and infectious smiles. She is oh so close to crawling, but for the time being loves to sit and play. Jackson keeps shooting up and is wearing 4-5s, which is amazing to me. Yesterday, I had a great time going to a consignment shop in town and picking out new clothes for them. It really is hard to not be nostalgic though when you realize how much your kids have grown and how much they will continue to grow.

Today begins fall soccer for Jackson. We are all very excited! :) It will be interesting to see how he's improved since spring.

What a great summer we've had together as a family! I am so thankful for how much God has blessed my life through my family. I am really looking forward to seeing what God has in store for us!

Wow -- my last post was at the end of May, and now it's nearing the end of July! Our summer fun continues, and we all had so much fun at the splash pad at Hawk Island Park tonight. Surprisingly, there was no humidity today, and a light breeze made the weather near perfect. Jackson absolutely loved running through the water, and we even took Lauren through the sprinkles.

We're all looking forward to my brother's wedding next weekend. Long trip, with the grandparents in tow, but it's the first time in a really, really long time our whole family will be together.

Summer is shaping out to be action packed (if you consider kiddie pools and soccer!) Jackson has already finished spring soccer and loved meeting new kids and dribbling the ball. Within the last few weeks it's snapped very warm (80s everyday) and we broke out the kiddie pool last weekend. It was fun to get Lauren in a swim suit for the first time, and I think I finally have a water baby - she loved getting in and didn't even finch though the water was a little cold. She even let me lay her on her back to float. We've been outside playing in our back yard or with the neighbor kids almost everyday this week. And, today we had a picnic and enjoyed walking around the zoo. With Jackson getting older, and all of Lauren's firsts, this summer is definitely going to be great!

Today has been such a wonderful day! I think I look forward to Mother's Day almost as much as Christmas and Easter. :)

The day started with a very special surprise. Matt had commented last night that maybe Lauren would sleep through the night for my Mother's Day gift. Imagine my surprise when I woke up from a wonderful night's sleep at 6:30 a.m. and realized Lauren didn't wake up last night!!! Of course, then I couldn't go back to sleep until I went in to check on her. Then I slept for a little while longer. Then when Lauren did wake up she was all smiles to greet me. :)

Jackson woke up around 7:30 a.m. and when I went in to greet him, the first thing he told me was "Happy Mother's Day!" I was so surprised that he did that without prompting (minus apparently the instruction Matt gave him last night before he went to sleep.)

My mom and dad spent the weekend with us, and so Jackson brought Grandma her gift and card. Then he gave me my gift. Earlier this week when I came home for lunch Jackson was so excited because he bought me a gift and wanted to go find it because Daddy hid it. He made me a beautiful card, and he memorized what it said so he kept repeating it to me during the day. I also got a daily encouragement calendar that I'm looking forward to bringing to work tomorrow.

It was a great morning at church! We got Lauren all dressed up for this special Sunday, and she really looked like a princess. Today she was dedicated to the Lord at church and loved seeing everyone and smiling.

We had a great lunch at Fazolis, and I even got to take a nap!

This has definitely been the best Mother's Day yet! :)

Jackson is a very typical three year old. The smallest thing can be a battle of wills; yet after a punishment for the way his will is displayed, waterworks ensue and all he wants is a hug and some comfort from one of us. He is free with his hugs and kisses and his fists.

Yet right smack dab in the middle of the frustration, say pooping his pants three times today, God reminds me of how He is pursuing Jackson's heart.

Tonight I watched the kids during small group and decided to prepare a more structured, learning time instead of free for all play chaos. I began an ABC Bible story series with them (all preschoolers), and we had a great time. "A" was for Adam and Eve, and we learned the Bible story through pictures, pretending to be snakes and playing follow the leader, and playing hide and go seek, just like Adam and Eve did with God. We learned that we should always be honest with God (and our parents) and that Jesus can help us do the right thing. We did the "Satan Stomp" to learn about the "bite the heel, crush the serpent" promise. We learned the letter "A" and traced it and colored a picture of Adam and Eve. We even ate some cookies (the only quiet time we had as they stuffed their mouths with chocolate chip goodness). It was a great night! Of course, mixed into that was Jackson getting a time out and spanking for hitting with his fists, but all in all, the time went quickly.

Jackson has really begun connecting that he can really talk to Jesus when he prays, and so lately, his prayers have been longer as he thanks Jesus.

This was his prayer tonight:
Jesus, thank you for follow the leader snakes, thank you for hide and seek, thank you for Mommy and thank you for Mommy and her teaching me Adam and Eve. (then he whispered some things between him and God). Amen.

Yes, Jackson has trouble being gentle, especially when he wants someone to do what he wants. He hasn't mastered #2, and stomps his feet when he doesn't get his way.

And, yet, his heart is still so soft. He does want to do the right thing. Today, he woke up from his nap singing "I Love You, Lord" loudly, and didn't want me to hug him until he sang it as loud as he could and whispered it to God, too. Even though it seems like we give him way too many time outs and spankings and take away toys for the same issues again and again, he is learning. The Bible is being hidden away in his heart and comes bubbling out in song, and in stories he tells to Lauren and in his prayers.

We might not win every battle of wills with him, but as he is growing and learning, Jesus is winning his heart.

We had a great Easter weekend! I had a half day on Friday, so I met Matt and the kids at the park for a picnic and then we enjoyed chasing Jackson around the zoo. Friday night, Matt led a moving Good Friday service at church -- a tenebrae service of shadows. As we moved through Jesus' last week through song and scripture, candles were blown out until there was only one, and as "it was finished" it was blown out. Then Saturday we went to an Easter Egg Hunt at a local grocery store and Jackson searched the aisles for eggs. He couldn't believe there was candy in each egg! (And, as a result, has been on a sugar high for a couple of days.) We also checked out several consignment shops in Lansing and picked up a few gems. Sunday, I definitely enjoyed dressing Lauren up for her first Easter. :) We had a great celebration service in the morning and sang some of my favorite songs -- Your Grace Is Enough, Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) and In Christ Alone. The kids had another Easter Egg Hunt, and Jackson added to his stash. I was told Jackson was fascinated by the story of the resurrection, and came home telling us about Jesus riding a donkey and the people saying "hosanna" and then shouting at the top of his lungs with as much excitement as a toddler can muster, "JESUS IS ALIVE!!" Then Sunday night, we celebrated Matt's 31st birthday with great friends at Steak N Shake.

It was definitely a full weekend, and reminded me of all those blessings for which I am so grateful to my Savior -- my wonderful husband, my sweet children and most importantly my life-giving God.

Yesterday evening, I got to experience Lauren's wide-mouth smile for the first time. She's been playing with her smile for about a week, and last night, we spent some quality mommy-daughter time smiling at each other.

There is nothing like having your baby really smile at you the first time - the kind of smile that starts in their beautiful eyes and lights up their entire face with joy. Your heart just melts and you want to do everything you can to keep them smiling and to get them smiling again. And then, you want to have them smile for other people so they can experience the wonder you did when you received it for the first time.

Our Father God must feel the same way! I wonder how He felt the first time our hearts smiled at Him, showing our love. He must feel joy when we experience success, elation and excitement. He created us to enjoy life and His love, and when we do, we give glory to Him. So many times we forget that God is our Father, and just as we experience joy seeing our children smile at us, so does God.

When's the last time we've just spent time with God smiling, laughing, just simply enjoying each others company, and invited others to join us?

:)

Recently, I read the story of God offering Solomon something amazing in 2 Chronicles.

 

That night God appeared to Solomon and said, “What do you want? Ask, and I will give it to you!”

 

The humility and respect Solomon displayed in his answer not only resulted in God granting his request for wisdom to rule the people of Israel, but also with riches and long life.

 

What would you have said to God if he made that same offer to you? As I thought about this the other morning, my mind drew a blank. I had no idea what I would say. There are so many things I could ask for, but this wouldn't be a "wish" you'd want to waste. And, I'm guessing God wouldn't have thought asking for an unlimited amount of "wishes" would be amuzing (that was always my answer as a kid to the question, 'if you had three wishes what would you wish for?').

 

I began to think, do you ask for something for your children, or your church, or yourself? Do you ask for something huge for an entire people group or country, or do you ask for salvation for one? Do you ask for something "spiritual" or something "practical"?

 

My guess for most is that they would ask for what is the dearest and most precious and what consumes their heart. So what is foremost on your heart? For Solomon, it was the enormous shoes to fill and duty laid before him.

 

Again, for me, I'm not sure. I wouldn't want to ask for something generic. I would want to be specific, even if I have no idea how God would make good on His promise. I would also want to answer the way Solomon did, with a contrite heart.

 

After much thought, I still have no answer yet. The only thing that kept running through my head as I read and pondered this scripture passage was the song..."Ask and I'll give the nations to you, O God, that's the cry of my heart. Distant shores and the islands will see your light as it rises on us."

 

Until I have an answer, I am going to seek the heart of God and ask Him to fill my heart with such passion for Him and for His Kingdom that it consumes my thoughts and desires. Even if I never have an experience quite like Solomon, I know that when I ask according to God's will, the answer will always be yes.

Our little girl, Lauren Adele Cobb, was born at 8:12 a.m. Jan. 29. She was 6 lbs., 14 oz. and 20 3/4 inches long.

 

Today she turned one month old. So much has happened these last four weeks...so much to ponder and treasure. Here is the start to my memory list of her birth:

 

1. I actually drove myself (and Matt and my mom) to the hospital the morning Lauren was born. We were running late and the car was set for me, so I figured I'd drive!
2. The most pain I felt pre and during the surgery was putting in the IV (unfortunately, the third time was the charm.)
3. The sound of Lauren crying was so beautiful!
4. I later found out that the cord was wrapped around Lauren's neck four times. I am so thankful that God arranged for me to have a scheduled c-section! I am absolutely certain that Jesus was with Lauren protecting her from the moment her life began.
5. I loved people stopping and oohing and ahhing over Lauren and her full head of hair.
6. There is something so remarkably precious about holding your child for the first time. I was glad that this time Matt was able to hold our little girl first.
7. I remember watching the nurses clean her immediately after she was born and just thinking over and over "Thank you Jesus."
8. In recovery I actually heard my mom raving down the hall outside the nursery. I was so glad she was able to be there for Lauren's birth.
9. The first night in the hospital, I woke up to Lauren tapping on the glass side of her "crib" looking straight at me as though to say -- Mommy, wake up so we can snuggle!
10. The second night, I had a chance to spend some alone time with Lauren and sang her song I created for the first time. She calms down every time I sing it.
11. Jackson's face was priceless when he met his baby sister the morning she was born. The first thing he wanted to tell her about was Jesus coming to earth, and then he sang "Jesus loves me" to her.
12. It's amazing how much you forget and then remember about babies.
13. It was wonderful to have so many visitors to see Lauren.

 

That's a start to all the things I want to remember about the last month. God has truly blessed us beyond what we could ever imagine. I am so thankful, so grateful, for such a gift.