serenityinchaos

The Pictures Must be Changed

No longer is our sweet little Baby Bear laying around waiting to see what comes next. She's playing the whole game now. She's playing in the front line too. A thoughtful child. Sitting and looking and studying. Then she moves...carefully at first because she might lose the sitting position she tried so hard to get into. But she moves and when she does it has a purpose and a predicted outcome. She WILL master what ever she tries. Why do we lose that I wonder? Why do we lose that thought that says " I can do this" without doubting for a second. But we do and so life goes.

She has teeth. She experiences what teeth do, what the feel like, and what they sound like. Teeth........who knew they could be exciting. Who knew that once we get older, what we as little children couldn't wait to get and to lose, we would curse? Life is so full of questions. Guess it wouldn't be life, for me at least, if there weren't loads of questions. I don't need answers necessarily, like the Bear does, but I need questions. She's a child that doesn't really need you to give her the answer to a problem. Just being there so she can occasionally look up to say ..."hey this is pretty cool huh?" She's a child who will search until she finds it. It's fun for her and frustration seldom hits. She has toes. Wonderful wiggly toes. Her hands can open and close.....she watches as she manipulates them. Then looks up and smiles. "Wow Grandma look what I have."

She now knows when the diaper needs changing. She has a look that says, "hello....... need a little help here." Few words, only looks. She has the vocab of any baby but says so much more than the words do. The child's heart is in here eyes. Her eyes tell her story. Here eyes tell you when Daddy or Mommy's car pulled in the driveway. Her eyes tell you the joy she feels when they walk in the room. Her eyes are indeed the window to her sweet soul. Wide with wonder and excitement. Her eyes are also telling me that she is not especially happy when one of them leave anymore. No crying just "looking". I wonder if we adults could communicate without using vocab. Interesting thought. Not sign language just eyes and face. My mind does wander and wonder still.

Along with this wondrous thoughtful side comes the side that loves to be silly, full of giggles, and I can see pranks are going to be fun. She looks at Daddy with that look that says...."when I can walk and talk I'm soo getting even with you." In better English than I use I would expect since I am the one that has taken to verb-izing nouns. She knows she can count on her Dad for a good time in a safe place. She knows her Daddy is person she can trust and love and get all that back in return. He tries to be soft and cuddle like Mommy but that's what Mommy's are. "Sorry Daddy, that's Mommy's job." Her eyes look to Mom for comfort and cuddle, and a warm, safe person with love when the world gets a little busy. Mom tries to add Daddy's jokes and giggles but Cassie knows. "Sorry Mommy, goofy is Daddy's job. I need a little love and softness only a Mommy can give." And she gets exactly what she wants and needs so badly to grow into a strong adult.

It takes both of them. Both, to offer her the well rounded safe world she knows. Full of all the love she wants and the encouragement and just plain silly every child needs to be happy. The love I feel when watching it all work together is indescribable. I only hope everyone reading this gets to experience the same thing. It's a true gift and I count my blessings every day.

Memmmmories.....(sung off key)

It seems just yesterday when I held a tiny hand and changed a tiny diaper and had to be ever so careful to make sure her head was supported. HA the game has changed and I'm loving it. Things I am remembering from the old days are coming back to me at record pace. The poop now reaches the full length of her back within the time you hear it happen, watch the giggle, and get her to the changing table. Never begin when you hear the first blast....there will be 2 more to follow. Then we're on. The girl lovvvves to poop. Now someone remind me to delete this before she can read. She's not going to appreciate my ramblings at age 13. I try to move as fast as I can but so often she outwits me now. The diaper is carefully undone.....I see the gift, a very large gift that now encompasses the entire area below the belly button. How it made it to the full front is a mystery only the Gods can answer. I look at the smile, hear the giggle and know I must move carefully and swiftly. This my friends is a sport that should be in the Olympics and I am in training. Not sure of a technical name for it. An absorbent layer must be placed under the whole child before even attempting to begin. Since we use hand made cotton wipes one must ready the wipes before removing the soiled diaper. I ready the wipes. It was a 2 wiper load. Just when I, knowing I am an expert in all things baby (pffffttttttttt, yea right), undo and begin to remove said soiled diaper, she starts kicking like a fish on land and laughing like she's at a George Carlin show. BOTH feet planted firmly IN the poop. At which point she decided it would be fun to try to roll over. Now 40 years ago this was not funny. Today....it cracks me up big time. Realizing that I do still hold some of the memories from the past I slam a clean cloth diaper under her and we head to the sink for a butt wash. We had passed wipes 5 minutes ago. Giggles continue as the water now has about flooded the kitchen and me. Kicking is FUN! After the wash I quickly wrap and head to the clean set up on the changing table...I made it..no chemical leaks along the way. Buttttttt....yup you got it. This time it was only a bit of fluid and the end came quickly. An easy clean up. I swaddled her for her nap and we read a book as she drifted off to sleep. Clean, smelling like a sweet baby and still smiling as she drifted off. I can't wait until next week to see what's next.

Who Knew...

I would have to tell myself to slow down once I retired? I sure never thought about it. I always thought I would have so much time on my hands I would get bored. Ha........not so. It appears that once I get more time I start making the list longer. Therefore still ending up with half a list left at the end of the day. Thennnnnnnnnn become overwhelmed and get only a bit or none of the list done. When i look into my psych training what do I learn? I'm one of "those". I really didn't have to take long to figure that one out. I knew it all along. The good thing is I know it and I do have the time to stop it befroe I go into meltdown. Today I'm not even thinking about what I need to catch up on from yesterday. I'm starting slowly and picking things off one by one. Like a tiny mouse with a huge wheel of cheese to carry out of the kitchen. Bit my bit and it will all be gone. And so it goes.

Sniff.......Stella Has Passed I Think

If you have been wandering around my site for very long you will know of the perils of poor Stella the rambling rose. Last season, her first year with us, she somehow got planted in full shade. As the season progressed it soon became apparent to all, she must be moved or she wouldn't survive. She was gently removed from her poor choice for housing into a much more "rose friendly" area. She struggled and gasped but seemed to be winning her fight against the lack of photosynthesis. This spring she looked like she might have made it. Her branches were still pliable and she had a few signs of leaves beginning to pop. Then it happened. All growth stopped. She seemed to crawl back into the ground and simply gave up. We stopped all support and let her go peacefully. I won't give up on her until next year. She's still sturdy in the ground and shows no sign of disease of mold. Keep the faith and may the force be with her.

My Goodness it's Been a Long Time Since I've Been Here

This has gotten much longer than I anticipated but I need to write it. Feel free to nod off now instead of plowing through my ramblings. Strange things are happening in my life. I wonder if what's happening is what is called growing up. I hope not but it certainly is enjoyable. Long ago when I was but a wee tyke I dreamed of a having a big family, a small farm with only the sweetest of animals, and all the money I ever wanted. Several dogs that talked to me and were true pals. I do believe in another life Peggy and I were neighbors on the prairie. We wore long cotton dresses with great aprons to wrap around chilled children, to carry eggs in and to wipe away tears with. Not only did little to none of that happen, I have truly grown to understand what I DO want in life. My dreams are much the same as in the early years, yet have taken on a different twist. In my younger years I thought everything was falling apart. It was actually and I wasn't sure it was worth going on at certain points. I would live a fruitless life, helping no one, never reaching my dreams and pretty much just getting to the end without hurting anyone. Pain turned into a way of life and I would plow through one day at a time never having what I wanted. I knew I wanted to be involved with children. I wanted to make a difference in some child's life. I wanted just one child to remember me when they grew up. About a year ago things started to change. I'm not sure if things changes or if I began to look at life differently. Today my life is full. I see the wonder before me as I look into my granddaughter's eyes. I watch as she grows and develops and becomes the person she will be. I watch her Mom and Dad look at her with deep love in their eyes. I see hopes and fears in their eyes. I hear the love they have in their family and I am happy. I'm content. At peace with my life. I can honestly say I completely believe in the circle of life. I sometimes feel guilty to be able to enjoy so much in my life without really working very hard. Let's face it, raising kids is a lot of work. Both physically and emotionally. I feel guilty being able to love her so deeply, enjoy having her in my life along with my son and my dear daughter in law....that DIL just isn't a strong enough word to tell how happy she has made be by being in our life. A kind thoughtful person. Ok I'm getting mushy but I feel mushy. Mushy is good.

I thought my years working with children had pretty much been a waste since I was never able to help the hard cases as much as I wanted to. Facebook, believe it or not has also added to my true serenity at this point in my life. I was browsing around the site and came across a picture of my Nursery School class sitting on the steps of the church we used. One of the comments ...from one of the students in that class was......yea boy those were the good ole days. Ok I cried. Yup, it truly touched my heart. Just a few days ago I met a student who wanted to have my email address so she could touch base again now and then. I DID IT! I have made a difference. Ok I didn't change the world but I have touched a heart or two. I don't miss working but I will forever miss the joy of working with kids. Clean slates waiting to be filled with wonder. I have my chickens, I keep the cookie jar full. I just know there's more. I don't know where or when but I know I'm not done. As a matter of fact I may have just started.

I Have Foiled My Squirrels

Those of you who have been tuned in for the past year know I have an on going battle with the wildlife that lives in my yard. This year I took on the task of planting a spring garden to include tulips. That just happens to be the beasts favorite food. I used metal cages, cayenne pepper and any other deterrent I could find. I did NOT ask permission from PETA to do it. Food Chain....I win! That is until some big ole grizzly moves into the neighborhood. Way up here on the hill our growing season is about 2 weeks shorter on both ends compared to town. I wasn't expecting much considering the incredible smarts of the furry little thieves. But I WON! I haven't mulched or anything so it ain't pretty but it made it! 1 for the human...........critters...0.

I Have Decaplets...take that octo woman

I have surpassed the Octo Woman! Call the news people, the AP, Al Roker, everybody you know. Ha and they are all well and need no help breathing or eating. They are NOT drugged nor will they be. I have stepped back in time 40 years. No photos will be released until I see if they make it through the night. Besides if Brad and Angie can get $14,000,000 for that mop head they have can you imagine what 10 beauties can bring? There's no telling what I can make on this deal. And I'm not stupid enough to give the money away to some charity. Yes my friends, 4 Black Sex Linked babies, 4 Road Island Reds and 2 New Hampshire Reds. They have been put to bed and are all toasty and warm. In a few months I will reap the joys of fresh eggs. No more drug infested eggs that are pushed out of poor abused chickens that aren't even able to walk. Eggs go on sale sometime in the fall. $1.00 dozen. There will be a "on your honor" stand at the end of my drive way. No I don't want to visit with every person who buys the dam eggs. You see I'm intending on doing a bit of research as well as raising chickens and selling eggs. Of course DS will join me in the endeavor on his Island. Journal entries start tomorrow. Mark your calendar! Can't get any better than that. Free Range is a "good thing".

Ponderables For The Twlight Zone

Why do I get hotel hair? I bring my own shampoo and hair dryer and do it the same way I do at home. I come out looking like Rosanna Rosanna Danna each morning without fail.

When traveling I spend a lot of time in the road side rest areas. I think we have visited every one along the eastern seaboard. Magic toilets scare me. I had one go off 4 times and I was disgustingly drenched by the time I left. I will decide when to flush please.

Women, when joined together in a Kwik Fill, can and will commandeer a men's room!

There is a secret translation to the coupons you get in the Roomsaver book. Not having the translation dictionary with you can lead to serious problems.
1 - Air-conditioned - The windows open
2 - Restaurants nearby - Within hiking distance - leave well before you need to eat - pack a lunch to return to your room
3 - Newly renovated - Fred The Handy man painted the trim
4 - Free Breakfast - Toast and watered down juice available in the lobby from 6a.m. to 6:30 a.m.
5 - Outdoor Pool - Fred will be glad to inflate it for you when he finishes painting

6 - 150 TV channels - 4 of them are available

7 - Ample Parking - only 1/4 mile from your door

It is impossible to get a GOOD cup of coffee on the road. I am excited about the fact that Starbucks is opening many drive up stores along Rt. 95. Getting DH to stop at them is another story. What can I expect, the man thinks Maxwell House is gourmet.

Screaming children are either tired or hungry..........FEED THEM OR LET THEM SLEEP! I am not impressed by your permissive parenting by letting your child run free in the eating establishment. He's not cute!

When traveling over 1,000 miles from home I do NOT want to meet childhood neighbors, people from Lima or the guy who knows the guy from Dansville.

After 6 hours in a car a waitress can be your best friend and fun to chat with. DH can repeat his 60 year old stories to her and to her, they're new.

What else should I add. I must ponder.

Home At Last

I'm finally home from what turned out to be a 2600 mile ride for lunch. An interesting ride for sure. Not at all what I had planned but a ride. Yesterday wiped out what little time without pain I had. Today it is alive and well and living in both hips. I will garden anyway. I will do what I do every spring. Work until I can't move and then spend the next month trying to get back on my feet. Maybe I should rethink this plan.

Twilight Zone Revisited

The trip continues. Yes, it could be worse. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. I don't want to mess up my karma any more than I apparently already have. As we entered the surrounding towns near Orlando there were huge flashing signs hanging over the road that I could only get glimpses of since the speed limit is 70mph. They were flashing..alert be on look out for silver Hyundai 2002...tag number followed but couldn't read it. Holy crap they're after us. Since we are both old tired and bored by now we were a little excited about being mistakenly busted for something we didn't do. The signs continued for many miles. Should we turn ourselves in? As we approached the city we were crawling along in 20mph stop and go traffic...after several minutes we saw a silver 2002 Hyundai slammed against a guard rail and 3 police cars. Hmmm guess they found their silver Hyundai and it ain't us. That's a good thing, but darn that would have been fun. We finally got to my daughter's house. It was her turn to be annoyed with my incessant whining and controlling. Lucky kid. Did I let it get me down that it was freezing? no way ..the sun il come out tomorroooooowwwww. Yup it did and I held down the couch for a few days. The day arrives when we must depart. This time I knew all would go smoothly and we could do some sight seeing and real history digging. After all I could almost walk by then. I know. I said....(remember I never bother with quotes or commas where they belong when writing. I figure you all know where they should go..if not hit the little x in the top right corner and just move along).....let's go spend a couple nights camping in Anastasia State Park in St. Augustine. I think I feel good enough. OK..so off we went. Wait JUST a minute...this all sounds too easy right? Well, apparently things don't always go as planned in my world. A murder on route 4 had traffic backed up and main routes out of the city closed. Smart man driving didn't need no stinkin map and managed to take a toll road twice and make a 2 lovely, huge circles around Orlando only to arrive at start 2 times. *note-we did not receive $200... Tolls at this point were now eating up our vacation budget. We persevered. Finally out of the city we headed for the orange place to buy a few real oranges to take home. Something seemed amiss the minute I saw a California sticker on one of the oranges and the fact that the oranges were perfect little orange orbs led me to believe these were NOT what I wanted so we left and headed on our way to our wonderful state park. The skies were getting dark but what the heck it's a warm rain. The town was like a ghost town. A wanderers delight. We thought long and hard about blowing what little money we had left on an ocean front room. Then I decided no we would stick with the camping plans. It's not that much rain and it's clearing. It cleared to be a beautiful day and we were lucky enough to find our favorite cafe was still alive and well. Had a perfect Cuban and headed for the park. The ride was amazing. But for some reason I didn't want to camp. I have no explanation as to why I felt so strongly. I just absolutely did NOT want to camp. We left and found a nice hotel just out of town. Had to eat at Denny's but I hadn't had my usual cup of restaurant salt that day so it was fine. About 2 hours later it started to pour. And I mean POUR! Parking lot was flooded. Not to worry we are safe in hotel land. Whanna bet? TV flashes TORNADO WATCH....not warning mind you......Front desk on phone...what do we do......no problem building is supposed to be tornado proof....that's a joke right?... THE TITANIC WAS UNSINKABLE! Ok so we were to get under the mattress....nevermind I will trow my back in all directions while accomplishing this...better than dead I suppose....down to 5 minutes to touch down...the siren will go off if it hits...you'll hear it. Ok! Must be the mattress has great acoustics. Time passed and we found out the little monster veered out to sea 4 miles before us. TG!!!!! See it could have been worse Today has been uneventful and almost a little sad. We'll see what the rest of this adventure from the Twilight Zone trip has to offer. TBC

I Know What You're Saying..somebody email me I'm bored to tears

Where is she, where oh where can she be. Well, I'm gonna tell ya just where the hell I am and just what I'm doing. Am I in the cold cold north? Nope...where oh where is Carman San Madigan. Flat out on a bed in a hotel just north of the Florida border. Sciatic nerve has me crawling on hands and knees to and from the bathroom (and I won't even walk on a hotel room floor barefoot) and spending more nights in this little Podunk town than I care to speak about. Go to the doctor you say? I'm retired with a retirees insurance. So I eat handfuls of pills and crawl around. Today I did some sciatic stretching. That surely helped you say? It certainly did. And while approaching something near the dog thing I pulled a muscle in my ribs. Can you say AHHHHHHHHHHH boys and girls?
What have I learned. People who run hotels can be very kind when you really need them. they save breakfast for me until Bill can go down and get it. Husbands CAN be there for you if you relly need them. Poor young good looking Spanish boys who are maids and don't speak English can be truly lovable when you need them to be. The Do Not Disturb sign has been on my door for 3 days. He knocked quietly yesterday and then put clean towels and the regular hoel stuff outside the door. (I don't know what you call a boy maid) The camping trip seems to be off as is the horseback riding and the body surfing I love to do in Melbourne Beach. Crap! It's just not my time. Stay tuned for the continuing sage of A Sojurn (looky I used a vocab word) Gone Bad. Wait......I could be dead from a car accident on route 95. Sure changes my outlook on a little pain in my arse.

The Bees Are Gone

Not one sting. Surprisingly all went smoothly. Sadly, the honey could not be saved since it was nasty. I'm not sure what nasty looks like and am really not feeling left out because I didn't get to be part of it. The house is now safe for all inhabitants and Doc the Demon Spawn can now go back to the basement and discover all sorts of good things. His favorite is to bring home something the cats have killed and claim it was his own. The DIY list can now continue. I haven't seen the list either but I think it comes in volumes. On the way home from my appointed rounds in Buffalo yesterday I just happened to find my way to Joann's. But not before getting lost a couple times. I HATE driving in Buffalo One cannot return via the same route one took to get to one's destination. To go east you must travel 10 miles west first. Toss the map out the window because it won't help. I have seen every inch of routes 190 and 290. I think the planning board did it deliberately to keep the city growing. Hell, you might as well buy a place there. It's easier than trying to get in and out. If I go directly from the Island to home I'm good. I should never veer away from that intended route. I eventually wound my way back to my trail and made it home. Buffalo is teaching me patience and tolerance! Thank you! Oh yea and I can't be trusted in Joann's in Buffalo either.
Dear Granddaughter is not fond of St. Patrick's Day. Mom even dressed her in her finest St. Pat's garb. Wait til she gets a taste of the corned beef and cabbage. That might change her mind.

Where I've Been and What I've Learned

I raised 2 children until they came to the age when I could legally throw them out of the house. Which, we feel, was done at almost the appropriate time. (not really but I digress) I sent them with love and groceries, telling them to tell the therapist in their life that what ever was wrong was indeed their mother's fault. I'm now watch my son and his lovely wife do the same. Another generation on the way into the world. My oh my is it different. My only wish is that I can live long enough to hear what Cassidy tells her mom and dad they did wrong. Think back. Our great-grandmothers told our grandmothers, our grandmothers told our mothers and our mothers told us. And so it goes. Now don't take this wrong my son never accuses me of doing anything wrong he only tells me of the new thoughts on things which I find absolutely fascinating and is probably saving millions of little lives. When I think back to the car seat we used for "safety" it scares the bejeebers out of me. They hung over the front seat so your child was in all respects a flying cannon ball to hurl through the front windshield should you be in an accident. Well at least that cleared him from the flaming car I guess. I shudder now. I was being safe then. Disposable diapers were disgusting and we wouldn't think of using them. Instead we all hung bleached sparkling cloth diapers on the line making sure they were whiter than the neighbors. They smelled clean. Not like some baby cologne purchased from a high end store. Ok now here is what I learned. You cannot feed a baby without a Boppy! Ha betcha didn't know that did ya? Well I'm here to tell you my granddaughter has a wonderful Boppy! Dad uses the Boppy and Mom uses the Boppy. Grandma however can't figure out how to wear the Boppy so she uses the arm of the chair. From what I understand parents today are free of "shudder arm". The feeling one has in their arm after carrying or holding a baby for hours. Baby is fast asleep, you put her down and your arm shakes for about an hour. I miss that. They put some sort of cloth thing in grocery carts. Now call me silly but doesn't cloth pick up germs? Therefore you get to not only wash it but first carry home with you all those disgusting little buggers. And what if the cart thing touches her other things on the way home. It seems a no win situation to me. The cart things confuse me. I want the kid in the hard cart so I can at least wipe the thing off if I so choose. My opinion is still out on that one. Disposable diapers, no matter how "sensitive" are bad. They keep the clothes nice and dry but the baby is in a poopy diaper for who knows how long before Mom or Dad get a sniff. The in old days one stuck a finger in the diaper and if it came out messy you knew you what to do. Today one must wait for the line to turn blue. Blue indicates poop! Yellow is just pee so you can leave it longer. Huh! No!
And so my education continues. Babies must sleep on their backs. 40 years ago babies who slept on their back got flat heads and would drown in their spit up. Thank goodness they undid that one. No more bumper pads and never too hot. This has saved thousands of little lives and I agree completely. However, isn't there always a however, what happens if the poor kid is by nature a tummy sleeper? Well, best of luck to ya but somehow make it comfortable for the sweet child. I get scared to death if her swaddle is too high. When you add up the price of diapers and formula you will soon reach the price of an education at the best of Ivy League Schools. So fear not new parents. If you keep saving the money you spend on diapers and formula after the child is long off both you will indeed be able to afford collage. My thoughts on that however are tell the kid they get nothing unless they have earned some sort of scholarship! Get a job! You parents have earned it! It's so nice to be the Grandma.

Déjà vu All Over Again

How strange to be watching the presidency unfold the same way I remember it when JFK was elected. I remember before the election watching a young, vibrant, often times down right "common" man trying to get our vote. And he did. I'm not speaking politics here, since we all know that is pretty much a waste of good typewriter ribbon. I'm speaking about what happens to the guts of the man who becomes King of America. I found pictures of a new, absolutely marvelous, swing that was put outside the oval office windows. (I think I'll get Cassie that swing set. Check it out. It's really neat) I think of John John under his Dad's desk. His youthful face already has lines that weren't there just a few months ago. Glowing pictures of his smiles are seldom seen anymore. The gray is more dense than I've seen it. I think of the lines added to JFK's face. Now I don't know if he has the same "hobbies" that JFK had but I think not. Michelle is the "Jackie" for the next generation. Not only is she gorgeous but she puts family first it seems and fashion next. Classic, nest, clean and stylish fashion. Fashion the regular people can afford in knock off designs. A women we can all, so far, look to on family matters as well as how to look fabulous when the press decides to attack your very being. A classy lady! Dad Obama doesn't trust cars to drive his kids around but prefers air. I'm with him on that. To me it shows he REALLY understands how volatile his position is or can be. His children have playmates. To me that says other parents trust these people. I'm not sure I'd let my kids even near the girls considering the risk it might be. Well, I guess what I'm really saying is "can this be real?" Let's stay tuned and see if this turns into the JFK catastrophe and if we have been conned or could it be this IS a real family with real values. I know I'm interested to see it unfold. NOT the politics ...the family.

Life With a Purpose

Well, it's been awhile since I've posted anything new here. Busy, Busy, Busy~! On Tuesday morning I pack a suitcase and my laptop and head to Grand Island. I take my time and try to enjoy the drive. Through snow, sleet, rain and dark of night I drive. It matters not what the traffic is like or even the weather. (even if I do have to drive through Wyoming County where we all know it snows until August.) Why you ask? Because I am "needed".......finally after years of kind of just moving through life...... to take care of my dear sweet granddaughter. The newest love of my life. Each week I walk into the house there seems a new child is there. Mom and Dad don't notice the drastic changes when just a week has passed. The growth and development is mind blowing. To bore you just a bit more I must comment on the joy of watching a baby try to find her "voice". She has her Mom and Dad's ambition to succeed. I can see it already. I see the same frustration and determination her Dad had when his brain knew what it wanted but the body wasn't sure how to accomplish it. Unlike the time with my own children, I can rock, rock, rock for hours and never tire of it. I can change a diaper with the surprising special delivers all the way up her bask..get ready with the new diaper only to have her give me another special delivery before I get the new one on. Not an ounce of frustration but instead I giggle with her. I think she knows what she's doing enjoys making the mess. Yup, she's that smart. ;)
I spend the night, sometimes 2 nights. My words are not coming the way I want them to so maybe I should continue this tomorrow. One thing grandma isn't used to is "baby hours". Stay tuned!

Got my first grandma gig

Monday! The journal will begin. Mom has to go back to work and Dad is in great need of a fishing get-a-way. That leaves me with my precious granddaughter. I'm sure it will be hard for Mom and Dad but me?.......not so much. The bed is ready. Thank heavens Erin gave me the heads up about the basket idea. lol I can't wait. Rest assured a new journal entry will be posted. Stay tuned for further developments.

And so it goes

A few moths ago I got married and had children. One moved to Florida last month and the other got married last week. I think I worked at the school a few days and then went to Aruba for lunch one day. Yesterday my son and his wonderful wife had a baby girl. She's smiling and giggling now. The baby that is. My what will tomorrow bring. Yup, that's my life at the speed I feel it. You young 'uns don't get it yet, but you will. I want time to slow down. I want Cassidy to walk in 3 years, not tomorrow. But life doesn't work like that. I can't change a thing about time. I can however examine the speed at which I whirl though each day. I look back and remember a particularly stressful spring many years ago and remember I totally missed the lilacs and I walked past them several times every day. Yup, life's like that. The blossoms come, followed by beautiful flowers, only to fade and start the process again hopefully. I can't go back and revisit those lilacs. But I can be darn sure I never miss them again.

So glad to find I'm not the only Mrs. O fan

I felt her enthusiasm during the speeches and parades a breath of fresh air. I really like this lady. And she makes no excuses for not baking cookies...she BAKES...and so do the girls...TOGETHER! ...as you all know I still ticked at Hilary for that one. She IS a first lady but she is first a Mom and a DW too. A First Lady who can give the thumbs up to the marchers is a good thing. And her DH never once turned to her and said, hey, Shel, cool it a bit! She had FUN! The other person I was delighted to watch was no other than Yo Yo Ma. That man had a good time! I love to watch him perform. Issac Perlman could take a humility lesson from him. And would you tell me, who...but ARETHA.. could get away with that hat. You go girl!
I believe this man truly believes he can do what he says he can. Ah to be so young again. When he first started walking up to have the torch passed I thought he had a huge look of arrogance. Not so the longer I watched. This man was breathing, watching, and taking in every minute of what was happened. Yes, Erin class and completely touchable. I think she will go on my "would like to meet" list along with Babs. Sorry can't like the gold number.
I did find a document from his doctor that said he chews Nicorette...yea Obama! A human!
Those girls are gorgeous well behaved and it seems, allowed the be kids. Oh blah blah I must shut up. Still not sure about our VP. It's that look on his face that makes me, for some reason, not trust him.

Here we go again............

I know many of you think Michelle Obama is scary. I like her for some reason. She'll burst my bubble along the way somewhere but so far I like her. But will someone please tell me who the heck picked that little gold frock number she's been wearing today. It makes her look like a cow and she's not. Color looks horrid on her and her hair is not windproof. Someone needs to take control fast. Jackie O she ain't. Milley Cyrus and Billy Ray for the kids concert. I wouldn't care if my kids did want them it wouldn't happen. Ok more to come on this as I get more info and calm down from the stoke I had about the gold frock.

I' am Not partial.....new picture

This is indeed the most beautiful child ever born. Well, next to yours or course.

Time For Me To Check In

Wow what a crazy life I am leading. Wishing for a granddaughter to hold and got the stupid dog instead. Where did I go wrong? I was hoping for a sweet bundle of joy to cuddle and coo over. Nooooooooo what do I get.....the Demon Spawn. Now don't get me wrong I am actually starting to like the dumb mutt. But even I have limits. Fortunately the little family is on their way to my house so at least I will have a few moments with her while the new Mom and Dad fuss over Fido. So today I get to be thrilled the mutt is going home, pray my kids don't end up in a ditch somewhere and cook a great dinner. A cook out even. Hmmmmmmm not a cookie in the house. That's not good for a Grandma. I must buy the little tyke a bed. We can't keep sharing the crate between the kid and the dog. What if they both need it at the same time. I have diapers, blankets and little things, but no bed. I do have a lovely clothes basket. That might work. At least I don't have to take her out on a leash to pee. Thank God! Again thanks to all for the good wishes I keep getting. I'm even starting to like people. Now that's scary!

On Becoming a Grandmother

Life has been a whirl wind for the past few days. It proves your life is full of "firsts" no matter how old you get. A tiny hand grasps your finger and your heart melts. A wee sound comes from a bed in the corner and you can't get there fast enough. You're son looks and sounds different. He seems more confident. More a man than the 17 year old you have seen for the past 15 years. You can see his priorities have changed. He moves with determination and purpose. He is a Dad! You watch the look on his face as he holds a tiny body in his arms. A precious gift he and his loving wife have created. He holds the miracle of their love. And the circle of life continues. I have had more emotions run through me in the past week than I realized I could feel. Leaving Buffalo my heart hurt a bit. I miss her. I miss her smell, her sweet face and the feel of her in my arms. It's time for Grandma to grow up. Time to sit back and watch what life is all about. Time to sit back and watch as a new family is born and lives their life from day to day. Time to be here when I'm needed. Time to realize when to stay away when I'm not needed. Time to love and let go. Yet, time to always be there. Thanks to all for the well wishes.

One of the Best Days in My Life

I guess you can tell from the changes in the pictures our Little Princess has arrived. She had a long hard road coming into the world, as did Mom, but both are doing great and hope to be home tomorrow or the next day. I can't explain to you what it feels like to watch your son become a father. The circle of life is so much more than a song from Walt Disney Movie. I'm very tired tonight but I wanted to make sure all of you got to see our sweetie. The photos they took in the hospital will indeed prove her eyes DO open and close. So far I have only witnessed one eye being open. That was accompanied by a horrid grimace and big grunt. Hmmm!!! lol

It's Been a Long Time

I'm finally back. For a few minutes anyway. I have not left my Lady Room for days. I know my way around a computer pretty good. Thought this whole computer sewing thing would be at least easier than for someone not having any computer experience. HA! You see the sewing machine speaks a different language than any regular computer so one must...let's say...translate every little pixel that goes in there. The are many, many editing programs but all at great expense. We're talking $$$$ and upward. So cheapo that I am have downloaded all the free trails I can get my hands on and they only let me use them for 30 days. Being the ever content person that I am....stop snickering.........I now have a great need to make my own designs. Soo that means I must learn embroidernese now. I want perfect and I don't like the free designs on the web. To buy files for the machine can be outrageous too. $15.00 for some of the nice ones. That's for one design to embroider. Of course I have my eyes on all the really expensive ones. $99 for 6...What a bargain huh? Hey I can make Barbie clothes on this thing Peg!
Update on baby Cassidy. Kid is huge!!!!! 7# Dad says and still 4 more weeks to go. Poor Monica can't sleep....sweet little baby decides to kick her sciatic nerve half the time. She is having a heck of a time getting comfortable. Think we might have a Christmas baby? There goes the birthday parties. :) Grandpa has gone to Grand Island this weekend to help ready what must be ready. All in all she could have her today and all would be fine but you know how that first baby is. I am sorry I don't get here as much as I should for my mental well being. I find as I'm typing I have missed not being here.
Well, since the house is without man this weekend I am off to create all day. Bring on the coffee!

Goodness it's Been a Long Time

As I'm sure you all know I have been glued to my new machine. Yes, another thing to obsess over and learn. I'm a bit of a pig when it comes to learning new things. I have learned more about thread than I knew there was to learn. This is a whole new computer experience. Density, tension, stitch count.....yikes! The program I need to do the editing I want is over $1,000 so that's not happening any time soon. I am feeling really stupid today. Fortunately I don't mind telling people I don't understand something and am ready to pick their brains until they bleed. I have found a web site with a forum just for my machine brand. The people are so informed I'm posting like a wild woman. BTW don't buy an embroidery machine over the internet. I got a great deal but it wasn't worth the price of not having a local dealer to talk to. Ah yes live and learn. That's what it's all about I guess. Soon I hope to have some pictures. Don't hold your breath.

Oh My Oh My

I am going to be homeless and living in the streets. It's so easy to download embroidery files it scares me. Along with each download comes a fee for the file of course. But you want to know something really sneaky about the site? The more you buy the more discount you get and it doesn't show up until you put the next thing in the cart. Sooo as I buy the prices get cheaper and cheaper. It is a shopaholics nightmare and blessing, I haven't decided yet. I have also recalculated the thread I want and so far we're at $300. As luck will have it, at the J store the lady who works in the sewing machine department......which is Viking not Joanns........told me that thread goes on sale there all the time. 50% OFF! Now we're talkin. It's her fault I found that site too. She works for Viking and is not to tell non-Viking people about all the goodies. But you know how we gals are when we meet someone with the same interests. Rules be damned! She's a grandma too of course. Sean is bringing me his plain onsies and I can make them all beautiful. Well I'm going to have to learn how to really work the thing first. I found those cute little ...well they call them vintage......I call them the embroidery grandma used to do.....for kitchen towels........you know...from back in the day. I have yet to name here since we haven't actullay bonded yet. We haven't had time to sit and really talk. Maybe today.

She's Herrrrreeeeeeeee!

Finally! The poor Mr. UPS came dragging in last night about 5:30. What a long day he had. I was so excited. Then I opened the box. I was totally overwhelmed and thinking omg what have I done? Ok, that was just my initial response. Then I got over it, tore into the box and had her running in about 15 mins. I didn't have anything I should have had, the correct embroidery thread, stabilizer, bobbins, etc. Did I let that stop me? Never. I talked gently to her, told her of my problems as far as supplies went. She seemed to understand. I threaded her up with plain ole thread asked nicely if she'd work just this once with inferior materials and off we went on our first adventure. Stuck some paper on the back of a piece of muslin and we started to dance. I must admit that once you get this thing rolling it's actually a pretty boring thing to do. The only skill required so far is being able to thread the machine and push a few buttons. I than sat for the allotted 20 minutes while this machine sewed the loveliest butterfly. You do nothing other than push the start button and she does the rest. Amazing. Yeah, you have to snip a thread here and there but that's doesn't take an Einstein. I looked her over after thanking her all over the place for the butterfly. I found she likes to write. Erin her handwriting is amazing. You would love reading her papers. She spit out "Cassidy Loves Grandpa" like a charm. At this point I felt I was overdoing my request from her and told her I would go to the J store today to get her the food she really likes and deserves. (also the poor girl was covered with lint and fibers.....which is why you need the special stuff I'm figuring). So you see I have to go to that store today. It's a must. After adoption one has a responsibility right? The saga will continue.

She's Lost in Space

I have been a company's worst nightmare today. I have gotten a run around for days on the whereabouts of my dearly beloved machine. The company says it's gone. UPS says it's not left the building. Today was a dodge ball game of emails between me, my credit card people (who have told me they have just the department to handle rip offs) and the company I purchased it from. When I was finally told the truth I found she had been sitting in a UPS warehouse for 3 days. I hope she was warm enough. NOW I am told.....by UPS that they will deliver her tomorrow. I've heard this story before. Time will tell. This is the first time I have ever asserted myself in a transaction. I was polite but didn't back down and inch! Yeah for me. Again.......stay tuned.....unless you hear the roar.

If I Had The Patience of a Saint

One of these guys would be heading to my house. But I have studied the breed and decided I've happy just watching. Shiba Inu pups.........

http://www.ustream.tv/channel/shiba-inu-puppy-cam

For a real look at these guys whackyness goggle you tube Shiba scream.

ARUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Refer to previous post!

Today's The Day

It's supposed to be anyway. The day my long dreamed about sewing machine arrives. It's not the big fancy expensive one but it's a start. It was supposed to come Thursday but apparently someone at Janome was messing with the computer and put my name in UPS by mistake or something like that. I didn't understand the letter so I just said, ok Monday is fine. BUT IT WASN'T! You wouldn't believe what a baby I was about it not coming and how sad I was. Now I remember how miserable it was when I didn't get what I wanted for Christmas when I was a kid. But I never said a word. We didn't back then. It was impolite. From that experience alone I will never promise my dear granddaughter a thing unless I am absolutely, positively sure I can deliver. But I digress yet again. If you hear a loud rumble from atop the hill fear not it is merely me after UPS delivery time and there was no sign of our dear local UPS guy. I love when he comes. I have read as much as I can find on the internet about machine embroidery the past few days while awaiting the arrival. I have also found this is not a cheap hobby so I better be good at it. Now, what to name her. I really feel like I must meet her first. Don't you agree Erin? It's impossible to name an appliance....is a sewing machine an appliance?.....without meeting first.
The fire has begun. What does that mean? It means it's time to fire up the evil antique pot belly stove in my kitchen and awaken any fly that may be in hiding. It means the temps in my kitchen will hover around 90 with nose bleed humidity. It means I can leave out chips and they will stay crisp for weeks. It means while this snow is blowing all around, my kitchen door is open as is the window. It means I wipe something off and walk away, turn around and walk back and what ever I wiped away has been replaced. I can dust every 15 minutes. NOT FUN! But cheap. I must stay calm and forget about dust since our heat bill is almost nothing. Lord grant me patience NOW! I will not obsess I will not obsess I will not obsess.
Back to the sewing forums. Stay tuned for further developments in the continuing saga of "am I really too old to learn something new". Thinking about you Erin. Peg, email on the way.

Awe Gee You Guys Are Great..

And I say that with sincerity not humor. You make be believe if I dropped off the face of the earth someone might really notice. Kinda neat huh? I have been doing some serious research on the back of my eye lids today. Yup, a mutant virus has invaded the Madigan household. Bet that dam bear brought it here. DH began by incubating the little B#S$%^D! I did my usual....WASH YOUR HANDS, COVER YOUR MOUTH, DON'T PUT YOUR TISSUE ON THE TABLE, WASH YOUR HANDS, STOP BREATHING WHEN YOU'RE AROUND ME, WASH YOUR HANDS. You know, the regular Mom stuff. The virus did not listen. Fine, see if I care. Well, about 4 days ago I began to care. I cared because I was coughing my lungs up, using boxes of tissue, the lotion kind please, taking any drug that said it might make me drowsy and a sore throat that would have killed a lesser person. But I'm a Mom and Moms do that stuff. Yes we do, temp of 103, juggling a kid on the hip and breaking up a fight over who has the next turn at Candy Land, slapping the kid who is hogging all the red Legos, whipping up a nice dinner in between loads of laundry, vacuuming with a tissue box under an arm.........while DH is on the couch with a temp of 99. But who hasn't been there. Today I just spent sleeping. Leah and Deklyn came to visit and I couldn't even hug him. Now that sucks! I shooed them out immediately. I would get to the computer open the browser and say crap I'm going back to sleep. But I think I'm getting better.
Then when I do finally get the energy to open my mail I find poor Erin has lost her best pal. I think that's one of the hardest things in life. It's so darn painful and there's no way to make your friend feel better. I'm so sorry.
On the up side of doing nothing worthwhile, I made the decision to go for the embroidery sewing machine. Yup, it's on the way. This is where I want to say I could not justify keeping the purchase local. The guy around here wants $100 more, plus tax for the exact same model I bought on the internet from an authorized dealer. I would love to support local business but just can't afford it. I paid no shipping or sales tax (came from Delaware) and was offered freebies to go with the machine. I can't wait until it gets here. I'm going to embroider everything. Do you think the cats would like a monogram? There will probably be many lengthy stories to come with the arrival of the machine so stay tuned.

Well I'll be darned

I, yes I, have nothing to stay. Do you suppose I've passed and don't know it? Must ponder.

Back To The Everyday

The first thing on my agenda today is to ask all of you photo people out there why, after I resize an image, to make it more manageable on the web, does it get all fuzzy? My daughter takes high resolution picutures that are beautiful until I start messing with them. Any help? I'm back and bored out of my mind. Which is going to last about 15 more minutes before I invent some job that will stress the bejeebers out of me. I'm happy that way. My body knows how to do stress. If I make anymore baby clothes my family will have me in a home. The fabric I have been waiting for has been discontinued (they JUST told me) so I do need a ride to Joanns. I'm currently bringing in all sorts of plants to see what they do during the winter in my cave without many windows. I have pansies in my Lady Room and herbs in the bedroom. So far so good. (that's a stupid saying) I want to get the gardens ready for the winter and clean up the mess the stupid bear made from eating everything he could get to in my back yard. For years I have always said people who say there are bears around here are all on something. Well I'm not on anything (unfortunately) and there was definitely a bear here while I was in Grand Island. My bird feeders are literally shredded. The suet feeders have been torn apart. And I mean torn.......ripped apart. If it wasn't a bear it was one hell of a big raccoon.
Next I will address the cancel rather than save issue. See aren't you glad I'm back? Since I have done the same thing many, many times I have taken on a little habit that has stopped my frustration with doing it. I will do it again, I'm consistent with my stupid mistakes. I use Outlook Express and as I type I occasionally "copy and paste" to a new email, spell check then copy back to Shutterfly. That way if I get frozen or do the cancel thing I'm at least part way still good. The spell check is better and I still make mistakes. Grammar and spelling are not my strong points. Well, not much is, that's why I put these things in my life.

Yikes Where Does Time Go

I don't know where it goes? We will be all together as a family beginning next Tuesday. Now I know that there will be moments when I will say to myself....why did I think this was going to be great again? As will the rest of the crew I expect. But all in all I can't wait. I've so many things planned. BUT as I have learned through years of driving myself and everyone around me crazy I don't "expect" anything. I keep all my plans hidden in my coat pocket so to speak and if I get to throw it into the mix....great...if not .....that's great too. I just save it for another time. Through the years I have learned I am not the only one with "the plans". Each has their own secret agenda. Nor do I always have the best plan. What I have really learned is that often mine stink and others have much more to offer. What a relief that has brought me. Here I was all pumped up thinking I had to do it all. Well aren't I just so special. I would have the weeks meals planned, where and when we were going and how long we would stay. Dam, no wonder I was always too tired to enjoy the company. I had put months of hours into "the plan". I know only a few things about next week.

1. My daughter's birthday is Tuesday. I am giving her a gift. I am in charge of the birthday cake which does not have to be handmade with hours of piping and special designs. Wegmans does a lovely job and no one cares. Hurrah no more hand cramps.
2. We are having a shower for Sean and Monica. Which mainly is for gift getting and giving. Oh come on you all know that's only reason we have them. I have a car full of gifts. I have no idea who bought them all, it certainly wasn't me!
3. I will go to the Casino. No one has to come with me but any of the family is welcome. I will of course plan this when nothing big is going on.

4. I am in charge of spaghetti sauce and corned beef and cabbage. Well, for cryin out loud I just thought of something. Cooking meat makes Monica "whoops".....DUH... I can cook it at home. There problem solved.

5. I don't have to do everything everybody else is doing. And with that brilliant observation I have freed myself of years of anguish. But I won't go there.
6. I get to play with the demon spawn dog. I do love him when I don't have to take care of him. Sorta like kids I guess. Other people's are nice. Since he and I often go outside alone we bond in a grandma sort of way. We both like the fresh air.
7. Grandpa to be is taking us all to a nice dinner. I will not pick the restaurant nor will I complain about the prices that I could feed a family for a month on. It kills me to eat food in a restaurant that isn't all the great and then they have to pay good money for it. But I can deal for one day.
8. Most of all I will have a great time. I love them all so much how can I not!

The Surprises in My Cedar Chest

What a time I had last night. I opened my cedar chest which hasn't been opened in years. To my surprise it was full of all the treasures I had stored away and forgotten about. You see that's the nice thing about getting older. You forget where things are and then have a wonderful experience down the road when you find it all again. There is a pair of Bill's button top baby shoes I still have yet to discover. But I will sooner or later. Right on top, in the little drawer thing, were my pink silk baby shoes. A tiny pink strap with a tiny pink covered button. Hand work in pale blue and pink French knots around the top and sides. I challenge even Petite Tresor to come up with something as sweet as those. I have carefully washed them and they are looking brand new. I also found Bill's baby blanket used 67 years ago for the first time. I decided it was probably dry rotted before looking at it. Not so. It is a bit thin but still usable. I began to take what was left of the satin binding off and I found hundreds of tiny hand stitches where I had sewed it back on so many times when my kids were little. It's washed and waiting for a new binding. I also found a quilt top I had done years ago for Sean. I have that washed and ready for quilting. The beautiful hand woven white blanket I brought both my babies home in was as good as new. Well, there are a few places that need tying but the rest is perfect. What memories all those things brought back and how wonderful to be able to pass it all along. Ah, like I said before, Life is good!

My Body Clock is Out of Batteries

I like getting up early in the morning. Wandering around my back yard seeing what the day has to offer. Of course there is the obligatory Good Morning to the creatures in the forest and then inside for my morning coffee. BUT..........something is really out of whack. This morning started at 2:30 a.m. Now that's not morning, that's still the middle of the night. I will plug onward through my day but I fear I may not make it the whole day. Who knows maybe this is part of what my son tells me....all you do is drink water and sleep for a few minutes. He thinks I'm old I think. Ha not so! Yea it is. Anyway.........I decided what the heck and took on my day in the middle of the night. Of course the only critters outside then where the raccoons and strange dogs that come in my yard to deliberately pee on my flowers. Oh yea it's deliberate. They get together and plan their rotation. I really fear this lack of sleeping is due to my lack of the "e" word. But let's not go there just yet. After perusing the estate I made my coffee. That done, I downloaded my newest Big Fish Games game trial. Ok went through my hour of free play and was bored to tears. I know....chicken soup. I tried, I really, really, tried to make a small pot. I really did. But my soup grows. I now have a huge dutch oven of soup that we will be eating all week. It does smell great in here though. Just like Grandma's. Ha and I'm going be a grandma. Maybe it's like being pregnant and I'm nesting or something. Well it could be. Ok so I'm nuts and just old but I do have my housework done for the day and it's not even noon. As much as I'm going to do today anyway. Can't wait to see what the rest of the day brings.

Today I Quit Again

I quit watching, reading, listening or talking about politics or news. I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut but for my own sanity I'm doing it. Slowly I led myself back into the media. Back into the realms of adjectives and word games that try to mess with my head. And there's not a lot there to be messing with. I'm tired of listening to people complain about the economy when they are living lives that have them over extended and now want the government or laws made to bail them out along with anything else that wants bailing. If one needs government control in their lives might I suggest they try China. Most middle class can't be out of work for more than a month. Lots a luck to those who have gotten themselves into that mess. The American slogan has turned into I want, I want, I want! No wonder the rest of the world sees us as snobs. I watched part of the VP debate. I have no idea what was said or who is going to do what. I read the reports of the winner and I don't get it. Questions were never answered. I know of not one plan that is going to be put into action if one of them gets to the top. The snide looks and giggles from Biden made me sick and the incessant rambling of Palin was ridiculous. Why is one woman given the right to pick the questions? I don't want an answer, I'm just saying. If there has to be an interviewer I want one who's gonna slam them against the wall until the question is answered so humans can understand it. How about we send the candidates to stadiums all around the country and have them answer questions from the real people? YES average Joes. Not the ones some media gal decides should be asked. I checked my TV to make sure it wasn't Saturday night and I had mistakenly tuned into SNL. Nope it was the real thing. After several attempts to understand what was going on I tuned into some stupid reality show. At least I know how messed up they are. So I quit! I leave the running of the country to the people who understand double talk. People who want to hear what they want to hear and will believe any idiot on a ticket that tells them what they want to hear. My best wishes to all who can handle it. I'm not the one. Nope it's me and my squirrels and I'm a happy camper. I am not playing ostrich which I can hear from the background. I have seen what's there, made myself aware and am making an informed decision to say I don't whanna play! Now where's my knitting needles?

What I Have To Say Today is on a New Link on the Bottom

Sent to me by a friend who really knows me!!!!

Slept in Until 4 this Morning

But unlike my 3 a.m. morning, today I'm tired. The quilt is finished. Not at all the way I wanted. If you have been following my stories (and God bless you if you can put up with that) I know the Guy Who Fixes Sewing Machines. The last time I was there we were talking about sewers in general. I said something about how I always seem to make some stupid mistake in a project and he said something about never meeting a sewer that didn't only see what they did wrong. It is the only thing I can see many times. Then he said something about looking at things made in the store and how nasty some of those things are and they charge big bucks for the stuff. So it is not at all strange that I look at the quilt and only see what I wish was different. As old as I am I know exactly what my Dad would have said if I had made it years ago. He would have asked me if I learned anything while I was doing it. I would tell him what I should have done and he would say, then your project was successful. Man that used to tick me off. But when I put that into action it gives me the instant opportunity to start thinking about Cassidy's next quilt.

Today, rain or shine, my tulips must go into the ground. And like an idiot I just filled the bird feeders. That probably doesn't make sense, BUT here's the scenario....... I fill the bird feeders. I then go plant tulips. The creatures of the forest sit in the woods, watching, and smiling from fuzzy little ear to fuzzy little ear. Why? Because they know as soon as I go inside they will have the dinner they have been waiting for. Fresh tulip salad. What they don't know and may not even guess is the bulbs are being planted this year inside a green tulip cage. I hope they have a good dentist because they are gonna break their cute little teeth this year. Ha take that you little raiders of the forest. I win! I hope!

My Thoughts at 3 A.M.

Good Morning. Oh gag, wait, that's not in my thoughts at all. What's really in my thoughts is why the hell am I up at this hour of the morning. My eyes are burning and my nose is stuffed. Thank you wood fire. Here we go. Hang on to your mucus cause it's going to be a long winter. I have, what DH refers to as, a money saving gift in my kitchen. A round Montgomery and Ward, 1800 something, pot belly stove. While the rest of you are freezing this winter I will be in my house with the kitchen at a toasty 102 degrees. A huge pot of water sitting on top of it in hopes of adding some moisture before the whole place crumbles into splinters around me. All windows available wide open. Now since I have already stated that I hate being cold I need to add some things here. 102 degrees with NO humidity is not the tropics. It's hot, drying, desert heat. It makes me sweat while I type. Any movement more than typing can bring on heat stroke. A constant supply of drinking water must be kept at hand. I believe this is why I am referred to as "fluid woman" in my family. I have a head ache. Lack of oxygen I'm sure. My skin is hanging is strange places and there isn't a spot on my that doesn't itch. This is also the time of year when I start my hunt for the perfect lotion and the perfect moisturizing soap. And Dove ain't the answer. This place is so dry it sucks the dove bar into slivers of dried things they make the soap with. Oh I could buy the expensive gooey soaps but have you ever tried to clean a shower or a tub after using that stuff? It takes nothing less than a double dose of 409 to cut the grease. A house cleaner might be the answer. Yes, someone who wouldn't mind cleaning up my soap scum because I would pay them a fortune. No wait I have seen my check book. Ain't happenin. So I will head to the store, after all it's Joann Day anyway, and read labels once again. This time I think I'm not going to worry about the soap scum. I'm going for the lotionyist thing I can find. I wonder if Crisco comes in Lavender?

It's Almost Done

The quilt I have been working on for our dear granddaughter is almost finished. I had to have the quilting done by machine thanks to the old eyes but the rest of it is all me and I love it. I hope Cassidy loves it as much as I do. I am pondering putting an embroidered label on it....you know...made by Grandma for Cassidy or something possibly a little more wise and brilliant. I do have some Pooh quotes I just love. I don't think Pooh will mind and Milne is dead so he'll never know. Besides the only reason he wrote Pooh stories is because he felt guilty about never spending time with poor Christopher/Michael I believe. Old goat! The son is actually quite bitter about the whole thing. But I digress. But then don't I always. There is one tinnnnnnny problem. I don't have the binding I want for the quilt. Yup, you all know what that means. I have time tomorrow. I also have developed an incredible urge to now make quilts for my kids for Christmas. I can feel my little hamster wheel starting to roll down the hill. I can feel the spinning starting. Who am I kidding I love spinning down hill. I just puke and keep rolling. I can be as overambitious as I want. I truly thought I was never going to be able to make the kids adult quilts. Now with the lady with the machine I can do it. I guess I should pass on to my dear young friends that all you can do today will not stay the same. Things will change. To be truly happy find the answers. They may be a little different than your originally planned but find them and use them. I'm using the Machine Lady to finish my dreams before I close my book!

MY TULIPS ARRIVED TODAY! All of you with major or minor green thumbs, do I plant them now? The book that came with them said plant as soon as they arrive unless we're expecting a freeze or a hot spell. Obviously not a New Yorker. I have another set of blooms on my roses and if it freezes on them I'm takin on Mom Nature personally. It won't be pretty. Well, I've got to rest up for tomorrow. Who knows who I'll meet in line. Babs Bush might be there and I've always wanted to meet a lady who would kick her dog for being rude on TV. Love that tough old broad.

Ok I'm Better

The sun is shining and instead of sitting in here whining I went out and got provisions. Yup just like in the old days except mine are full of preservatives that would kill my great grandparents probably. There was hardly a soul in the store and since I made a dash for it, before DH found out I was going, it wasn't necessary to stand in the middle of some isle while people glare at me while standing there so he can get caught up with the person he ran into who he hasn't seen in 2 days. Been a long time lots to talk about apparently. I hate when he tries to introduce me and says.... you remember this guy doncha? Well thanks a bunch. NO! I nod and smile. Sometimes I just go on about my business but then I must take 30 minutes to find the old geezer when I'm done shopping. I don't think those benches are because the guys are tired. I think women put men there so they can find them. Not today. Today I just breezed through reading all the labels I wanted and spoke to no one except the clerk. Now she was a sweet gal, BUT! I must look older than I think I do. She insisted 3 times I get someone to help me carry out. I didn't get mad but by the third time... I said really no thanks. You see this is cheaper than a gym membership. I don't really eat all this food I just take it home and give it to the neighbors then do it again tomorrow. Ok I didn't really say that but it would have been good huh? On the way out the gal who has been there since she was knee high to a grasshopper asked if I needed help. Ok this time I did say...you know some day I'm going to take some one up on that. Today I just want the challenge. Bless her heart she had a great giggle. (there is a fly buzzing around me who is going to DIE!) There. I love meeting people places I go. I always like most of them. I have no idea if they beat their dog or their children. I don't know their health issues or their family problems. Nor do I care. They are some of my best friends. I'm not sure if I've told this story but if I have just pass it off to old age. I was hiking a few years ago in the Adirondacks. A white haired gentleman with suspenders white shirt and white bread down to here, came up as I was going down. Of course he had a walking stick. Looked much like an old picture of Monet. He tipped his hat and said ....lovely day for a walk isn't it? I gushed in smiles and agreed. I will never forget that man. I bet he had no idea what an impact he had on me. Makes one stop and think what kind of an impact we leave in our own path doesn't it? My I'm wandering all over the place today. Oh well it's a nice trip once I find my way home.

I Hate Cold!

It's cold feet and hand time. From now until sometime in June 2009 I will be cold. It won't matter how many clothes I put on, I will be cold. I'm not even sure it comes from the temperature. I start to get a sinking feeling and bam I'm cold. The mornings, which I started today at 3 a.m., are darker, the cats are more than ready to run in the door and pound incessantly on the window if I don't get there fast enough for them. Who can blame them. I can crank the thermostat to 80 and I'm still cold. I hate the smell of dust blowing trough my furnace filter. I can feel the yuck from the wood stove on my skin. I will dust thousands of times and never get a cloth that doesn't turn a nasty shade of black. My nose will be stuffy for months. I think the cold is coming from inside not outside. For 62 years I have hated colorful foliage, pumpkins, Halloween, apples, boots, mittens, scarves and the rest of what comes this time of year. I hate trying to drive while I have 4 layers on and it makes me feel like I'm dressed like that kid from that Christmas story movie. I hate crunchy icy walks in the early morning and I hate having to turn on lights at 6 p.m. I hate having to go anywhere. I will most likely sit in my house for the next 6 to 7 months hoping for a lottery win to get me to the tropics. Now remember I am hoping for a lottery win yet I will NOT leave my house. That's plain NUTS! I thought maybe as I got older it wouldn't bother me as much. Although I did say that when I retired I was worried about my attitude as the winter approached. I can get really sour, really fast. I can't watch or hear one piece of the news without going into a tizzy about what idiots people are. And the election...............I DON'T CARE! Oh I can sit quietly and type or talk a good story. After all this time I know what all the articles about winter depression say. I know what to do and I know what to eat and how to exercise. Once that dark cloud sets in it's very hard to pull out.
This year I'm aware. I'm aware it's happening and I don't have time to waste 6 or 7 months under this dark cloud. So I'm trying. Trying harder than I ever have. Unfortunately I'm still in the thinking stage. Fortunately it's only September and I can get this under control before I get too far down. I've had many people try to pull me out and I just slap their hand as they reach for me. Not ungrateful, just "cold". No one can get me out but me and dammit this year I'm pulling out

This is SOOOOOO Cool

I don't usually read any news but this caught me eye. They found a piece of Mozart's music no one has seen. Well of course someone has seen it but not anyone who counts. Now don't ask how anyone can not keep track of a thing like that but apparently they did.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo!

I just got an email that said it might freeze tonight. Not just frost but FREEZE, I'm not ready to see all my beautiful flowers bite the dust. I really don't care about the veggies anymore since we have way too many and I won't make that mistake again next year. DH refuses to spray, water, or weed his veggies so I give up on the things. He says the strong will survive. Geesh. I have been lugging pots into the house like a mad woman. I have a very tiny house and now it's like a jungle. Oh they will all die back in here too, but not while I'm on watch and it's only September. Girls!!!!!!!!! Stella has new growth!!!! Sure now Mom Nature's gonna whack her. She did fight a good fight. Does anyone know what I should do with my climbing roses since I have never had any go as far as these bushes have? My spring garden is ready for my spring bulbs and I'm ready to go there. The nursery will deliver when it's time. I'm putting up little signs telling the squirrels that the bulbs are not tulips and they taste nasty just so they will leave them alone this year. Oh yea and I'm using bulb cages that I had the smarts to buy many weeks ago. Well, off to drag the potted herbs in to my little house of safety.

Here We Go Again

You are right ladies. I should have prepared better for what I knew was going to be a horrid day. The last time I was in court was in Rochester for the Feds. Man, now there's a place they don't worry about spending some bucks. First class all the way. Next time I'll remember where I'm going.

Today I will once again tackle the sewing beast. I have named it now. His name is Dameon the Demon Serger. Take note all of you with big bucks. This is how poor people do it. We sit in front of the broken machine. First praying (even the atheists (who will never admit it) do this one) that the machine somehow, over night, has healed itself. Yup, we think we were all wet yesterday and it was just threaded wrong and the reason it was chewing instead of cutting is because we had some settings wrong and this morning it's all fine. Pfffffttttttttt, ok, that being said we move to the next course of action. Ignore it. You all know how to ignore the naughty child and the behavior often goes away. Walk by and don't even speak. Pretend it's not a problem and as soon as it's time to sew we will sit down and all will be fine. Of course that doesn't work either. Ok sewing time has arrived. We again pretend it's all fine and start to sew since we have already prayed and ignored, this should have fixed the problem by now. NOPE the dam thing is still not working. Idiot DH walks by and says.......(I don't feel like messing with quotes, pardons to the English teachers among us) why don't you take it to the guy that fixes sewing machines. Now that is clearly the stupidest thing that he could say. He has no idea the guy who fixes sewing machines charges $100 to walk in the door. So I tell him! Quit loudly I might add. Just like a pit bull. No lipstick! He picks up on the mood in a flash and after 42 years has the good sense to leave immediately. Smart man. I look to see what exactly the settings are. They are all where they should be. Somehow in my uhmmmm, let's call it extremely attentive moments with the machine I have somehow nicked the lower blade BIG TIME. AGAIN! Blades without all of their edges don't cut well. Now mind you I am not new to sewing and am fully aware that trying to cut pins with any kind of sewing tool will not work. I have also already been to the repair man to buy blades from my last fiasco. I will have to return to the repair man without my machine. I don't want him to think I want him to fix it. I'll blame my need for more blades on liking to be prepared should some idiot run over pins with it when I loan it to them. The trip will cost me a measly $10 in gas and $10 for the blade. See I save a fortune by fixing it myself. That will not however fix the fact that it's a cheap piece of crap that should be replaced. I wonder if Santa reads blogs. And ya know what else? The fabric for Cassidy's quilt I have been waiting for 3 weeks for has arrived. Arughhhh!

Yikes What a Day

The wheels of justice turn verrrrrry slowly. Yesterday I was fortunate enough to get to sit in the most uncomfortable wooden benches I have had the pleasure of plunking my butt in for a number of years. The last time I was that uncomfortable was at Rose and Mike's wedding some 35 years ago. I was 11 months+ pregnant and they decided on the long ceremony. Since it was a Catholic ceremony at least we got to stand, sit, stand sit, stand, sit. Not so in the house of justice. You just sit! I am in pain today.
I wonder if they take into consideration that I will convict anyone after having to sit still that long, in that position, in that bench. I'm not a happy camper and I just want out, so burn the bugger. Why should I have to suffer. Sit the defendant's butt in a nasty bench, NOT mine. I know, I know, he's innocent until proven guilty but come on how many of "them" are really innocent. Most get off on a technicality not because they didn't do it. All we have to do is find "reasonable doubt" and the defendant gets to do it all over again. At our expense. I must ponder this justice system. Not the best, but what could be? I spoke to almost no one, brought a book I hadn't looked over and found it miserably boring. Back to my trusted grocery list making. Wait, we are supposed to listen to all that goes on while waiting. Well, that would have been nifty if I could have heard a word they were saying. PEOPLE it's the tech age. Buy a MIC! The judge had one. Call Bill G., he'll have something you can use laying around in his garage of stolen goodies. You're tax dollars are safe there folks. No wasting money on things we don't need. Things like mics, chair cushions and a water fountain (even if I would never use one). Oh yea and we were told there were candy machines but they were never full so don't bother. I passed all of the hearing thing off to the fact I know I can't hear all that great. Ok so I'm legally deaf. During a break I spoke to the 3 ladies behind me and confessed my lack of audio alertness. OMG they can't hear it either. During another break the gentleman in front of me turned and said he didn't have a clue what they were saying. At that point I decided this trial thing reeks faintly of a joke. The laws are a joke and the people waiting to be part of the jury are liars. We said nothing to anyone about not being able to hear. That's not right IMHO. Another ponderable.
I came home ready to attack my serger and tell it who's boss and make it sew. I did, it didn't and now the thing is leaning against the proverbial window waiting to be tossed out should I have one more argument with it. Today has to be better. (well whaddyaknow I just looked up the law on endangering the welfare of a child and the age goes to 18. Man, I dunno about that one after working with teenagers so long)

Ike Is a Mean One

My step-mom lives about 150 miles inland in Ike's path on the tornado side. She is living in a 5th wheel right now. Now anyone who knows me well knows my feelings about media coverage of anything. But even NOAA is telling us this is a nasty storm. I just wanted us all to remember the people in the path in our thoughts this weekend. I guess the blustery snow storms are really just an inconvenience compared to these stupid hurricanes. Just goes to prove once again, when we think we have it bad someone always has it worse. I must count my blessings again.

live Ike video link

http://www.vuetoo.com/vue1/SituationPageNews.asp?sit=2190

I Am So Busted!

I decided as long as DH was in Grand Island it would be a good time to just make a quick run to the city to pick up a few things. I was headed to the mall, honest, I really was. For some reason my car went right passed the mall entrance and made a left onto Jefferson. That's a nasty corner so I know I couldn't have planned it. I was astounded. I had no idea my car would do that. Then I thought ok the car knows better than I where I should be so I just sat there and let it go. Wouldn't ya know it, it turned left into South Town Plaza. Geesh, I was getting scared by this point. After going very slowly to the left again after entering the plaza it pulled right into a parking spot in front of the J store. Since I am a considerate person I thought it only polite to go into Joann's. I didn't want the car to think I was being rude. Just for a minute. I had 8 coupons in my purse and have no idea how they got there. Well, wouldn't you know it there was a person for every question, a product for every task and fabric was ON SALE! Ok so I spent another wad and went back to my car. Thanked it from the bottom of my heart but told it this has to stop and hoped it would cooperate this time since I wanted to go to the Christmas stores. Nope. Darn thing headed right to Penney's. Yup, and they just happened to be having a sale on baby clothes. Again, afraid of hurting the cars feeling, I picked up an arm load or 2 and headed back to my poor deranged mobile transportation. I was in line so long I got the shopper shake arm. This time I knew I had it under control and I wasn't going to ever tell anyone about the incident. The car was cooperative and went to the Christmas Stores. I got the floor lamp I wanted for sewing. None in stock so I schlepped the floor model through the store all put together, tripping over it several times since the cord kept falling, wire dragging behind me. I never make it out of there cheaply but I was afraid to leave my car alone to long since it was my only ride back to the hill. I'm in line trying desperately not to knock out the lady behind me when a dear friend attacked me from the front. Finally! I screamed, she screamed, hug, hug, and some other lady screamed my name at me. Oh oh know that one too. Hug hug chat chat. Ok the lady behind me is getting a little tense at this point. Well too bad because from 2 carts behind comes another hug and OMG I haven't seen you in ages. Chat chat hug hug. Now people are really looking a little pissed. Guess what. I didn't care. We chatted, I payed and we held up traffic for a bit. We tried to explain we hadn't seen each other in forever but all the clerk did was glare and say oh yea. We eventually got through the check out and nearer the door. Now remember I'm still schlepin the lamp. Dear lady friend says come see my quilt. Ok Great would love to. Where's your car. ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PARKING LOT! I schlepped some more. The quilt was amazing and I met a lovely lady who will machine quit my minkee baby quilt. This is the best day I've had in ages. Thanks all who were there. (oh yea and to my brilliant car) You know what. Most of us were retired. ALL of us laughed and had a great, even if, brief chat. You just never know how great a day might turn out ya know it. Life is good.

Well Today Sucks

Today I got the phone call. One of those calls no one every wants to get. My Dad's brother, my uncle, passed away this morning. I'm going to be taking a break and will be back soon. Love you all! BE good to each other. You never know what tomorrow might bring.

Really Bad News

Yes, I have lost 50 pounds. BUT! And I mean a big but! No pun intended. My gut is still hanging to my knees. Now if any of you reading this have queasy stomachs and are subject to being offended by TMI, stop reading. It won't stay up. Ok the top went with the first 20 pounds but there wasn't much to lose there. I don't mind that. Somehow my stomach has lost it's way back to where it belongs. You know what that means. Not only that but the butt is draggin too. I know of only one thing I can do. The most horrid, brutal, boring, frustrating thing I could think of. Exercise. I put my feet under anything that will hold me. I grunt, sweat, cuss, pant, and puff. Then I try to do a sit up. I can't do it but I try. Where the hell did my stomach muscles go? I tell you I have none. 5 pregnancies and 62 years have taken their toll. I look like Kate from Jon and Kate Plus Eight. But don't get me started on her. Or the 8 spoiled rotten brats they own and are milking for a fortune. I'm sure when they are teens they will love the episode of their potty training years. If my kids fought that much they would be crated like the Demon Dog. Ok so back to my dilema. I'm going to do it. I know in my heart the best dvd I have is the pilates one. But OMG it's a killer. I ache way to long after half of it. So I will move slowly into my Palates yoga dvd. It's a little more user friendly. IF after 2 months I still can't do a sit up I'm throwin in the towel and will forever love my southward bound "stuff". Hey, maybe they have suspenders you can hook on to your stomach, whip it over your shoulders and you're good as new. Nah, probably not huh? Maybe I'll join the gym in Dansville but I hear they make you actually show up.

I Have Problems

Wait, that's not news so I'll explain it. I have seen a sewing machine that will do what I want it to do while I'm doing something else. YES! I will tell it what I want it to sew via computer, it will say "sure, no problem, love to do it for you". I will go do a load of laundry when I come back it will have done what I asked. I have already named her. June. After all didn't June Cleaver do it all and never break a sweat? Never did get the heels though. May she was covering up the fact she actually had no feet. Could be. The pearls were lovely though weren't they? Anyway I digress. The stupid thing is way more than I can afford. Well, not way more but more than I can spend right now. I am obsessed with the memory of what I saw June do yesterday. Completely consumed. I am not a charger so it will have to wait. I have a plan. I will slowly stick money in a box. When the box has the dollars I need you will hear me shout from the roof tops. The only thing I'm hoping for now is Social Security making a mistake and sending us double checks this month. ROTFFFFFFFFFFFF......like that'll ever happen. A girl can dream can't she?

Fruits and Veggies Just Ain't What They Used To Be

They taste different. I'm not sure if it's because I grew up close to Lake Ontario in truck farm heaven or if it's genetic engineering. Skins on tomatoes used to be thin. You didn't need a butcher cleaver to slice them. Green beans used to be green. I mean really dark green. I never had a peach that wasn't juicy, back in the day. When we "put up" peaches the skins would all just slip off of the peach and the stone almost jumped out, after a quick soak in the hot tub. Radishes were never black on the inside and if there was a sale on potatoes you knew better than to buy them. Celery was strong. You didn't need much. Plums were always a good pick. I have yet to get a decent plum that isn't as hard as a rock or rotten on the inside. I have given up after years of trying. Cucumbers were 10 for a dollar and you never got a bad one. OMG I'm turning into my Grandmother. We had a milkman. Who among us can remember the little tiny loaves of Wonder Bread that weren't sliced. I think they used to have Snow White and The Seven Dwarves on the end and we saved all of them. I never did get Goofy but my Dad said that was ok cause I was already Goofy. Yeah sounds like a Dad doesn't it? I miss those things. I'm drifting again but it's fun. I miss my skate key, my Katy Keen comic books, jacks, a good wooden yoyo, my gyroscope, Miss Frances, hop scotch, and tag. (none of which were safe according to any government regulation and we still lived.) Didn't matter if you were always slow...YOU LOST! None of us ever went into therapy for it either as I recall. Ah well, time goes on and some day my children will write exactly the same thing I am only remembering different things. I wonder what they will miss.

Still Can't Plan My Time Wisely

And that very same thing was always written on my report card when I was little. The only difference now is I seem to have trouble sorting out if it's my time that's a problem or the people around me having problems with the way I use my time. You know, I think that on a report card is also not the students problem. He/she is simply not using their time the way the teacher wants him/her to use it. Ha, true, but life doesn't work on our schedule unfortunately. I thought I was using it very wisely and so does that kid. I've decided it's other people today so I have the refrigerator full of "get your own" food and I can do what ever I want without problems. Actually it's only my DH who has problems with my time so it turns out not to be a problem at all. He's a big boy and can actually make his own sandwich. Yup, I taught him. He doesn't mind either. So my importance is all in my own head as usual. I do have to eat today though. I seem to get all befuddled if I don't. Then I wonder why I want to eat all night. Not good for dropping pounds either. My body just says .."Hold on to every calorie, she's trying to starve us." I planted chrysanthemums (thank you spell check) yesterday. It's so nice to look out and still see color. For some reason I'm not having the best of luck with longevity like Peggy. But then I am all shade and she's all sunny. How disgusting. Boy, am I ticked about this stupid hurricane stuff. I have been trying to get to Florida for over a month. No sense in trying to go yet. It would be a better use of a reward ticket to go when we can go out and do things when I get there. Consequently I watch and wait and practice my patience and tolerance. I'm getting better. I do have plenty to keep be busy until mother nature decides to calm down.

Another Wonderful Day

One of the days I haven't had for years. A day I have planned that will make me bone tired and ready for an early bed time. And I'm happier than a pig in poop. I have a list I will never get finished today. A plan for every minute I'm awake. Each and every thing on that list is something I can't wait to do. What a strange feeling. A wonderful feeling! Another day of being me. Man, they all surprise me. Again I will speak of a lady I once knew who said she was finally saying, "Good Morning God" instead of "Good God it's morning." I'm not all that religious (extremely spiritual though) but I am that grateful. No wonder I was so miserable so much of my life. I suppose I should stop spewing forth all this gratitude rubbish or no one will ever stop by my page again. It just feels so good. Oh I have my moments when I think.....the same as I did last year.....I'll never get this all done, it doesn't matter, it's not important enough. But those are moments when I let my old thoughts back in my head. I soon push them out and they last only a quick minute. I wonder today how my friend-s are doing in school but don't want to go there for any reason. Thank God for email. Must go put sheets on the line. Lordy am I old fashioned or what. It doesn't matter, Hey........I'm my boss and I say it's just fine.

Today Is The First Day

I'm not missing it one bit. Today I would have been sitting in a stuffy auditorium listening to the poor little man who must come and tell us not to drink the bleach and not to start fires if we get cold in the winter. Poor guy says the same thing every year and every year I made my grocery list during his speech. ADHD doesn't go away. I'm living proof. I squash myself into the chair, try to stay still, but find I must constantly switch crossed legs and am never close enough to the door to bolt like some smarter members of the staff did. Nope I was confined to my seat. My grocery list getting longer and longer. Of course there was the Rah Rah speech and we were told how great we were and how this year would be the best ever. Hmmm funny we were told that every year. That had to mean the one before wasn't that good. Do the math, it doesn't work. After feeling like I could not sit still one more minute, another speaker would appear. Where DO they come from? That was always the time when I realized how the kids feel listening to teacher lectures. They feel just like I do. Not meaning to be disrespectful at all. I COULD NOT pay attention. My mind had drifted after the first 20 minutes. And I'm supposed to be a grown up. Guess what....grown ups have the same problem kids have if we were to be totally honest about ourselves. WE just have smarter and more polished excuses. Then it was on to wander the halls, pretending I was preparing for the next day, never really feeling a part of anything. Never having any real responsibility other than to set up the next free cell game. I hated not having any control over my work. I had a few great people to work with but was always trying to follow directions for their plan. Never my own. That was of course my choice, I suppose, for not getting the education that would have made that possible. My life was a sham. My joy came when the kid who couldn't sit still finally appeared in the doorway the next day. Thank God for those little monsters. I loved them and will forever miss their energy and enthusiasm. Today starts a new semester. I am in control of this one. I make the plans. I take the joy along with the sorrows. But in the end......my life is mine again. I suppose it always was I just didn't like the facts and I couldn't sit still.

7/16/2009 7:52:30 PM - 002020574607
omg I know I must begin again. Right now I am hobbling around since my back went south and the rest of me stayed north. Do you have any idea how much a little baby girl can poop? Yes, of course you do. And it's not the fun stuff. She's on real food! One of those where ya don't even attempt to take the diaper off just head for the tub. Even have to wash the play thing she was sitting in. This girl's a proud pooper she is. Back to my poop duty...ha doody ..duty..I kill me.

7/16/2009 1:10:01 PM - 002021340986
Where are your ponderings???

6/27/2009 12:07:36 AM - 002021340986
FYI I am pondering again, but will be away for a few days, so bear with me.

5/31/2009 1:39:05 PM - 002020574607
The handle..................bad Karma! See it all comes aorund.

5/2/2009 12:35:55 PM - 002021340986
This is why you are one of my favorite people Carol, you understand exactly where I am coming from! BTW the brush handle broke last night. Aesthetically unpleasing and shoddy workmanship. I really rate in this person's world!

4/30/2009 10:12:46 AM - 002021340986
I have been avoiding my blog, but will look and see what I can find about the tea rose.
Love the new pictures and can't wait for the eggs. I import them from Erie, PA now (my uncle's farm), but that is a long drive for eggs.

4/19/2009 2:38:58 AM - 002021340986
I think your trip sounded wonderful, and they are now serving ice cubes in hell.
I do like your tips though, and good call on the hotel room. I would rather be there in a tornado than in a tent!
Hope the sciatica settles. I know how painful it is - 4 months worth carrying Joe.

4/7/2009 11:35:58 PM - 001068341244
I'm so sorry to hear about your trip gone bad! It's like the Carol version of Girls Gone Wild!!! I hope you feel better soon!!!! I'm thinking of you!

4/7/2009 8:38:25 PM - 002020574607
Oh. lmao

3/31/2009 1:31:55 AM - 002021340986
My dear, I know how to sew on a button, I am just irritated that I had to sew so many on at once. :)

3/26/2009 1:00:31 AM - 002021340986
Hurray! new pictures! I can't believe how much she has changed already. What excellent hair she has.

3/22/2009 4:06:50 PM - 001068341244
Sorry I've been so out of touch! I feel like I have been running a marathon for six months only to think I'm getting to the finish line and I find out it's not a normal marathon, but a quadruple marathon...how are you?! I miss you!

3/21/2009 10:01:50 PM - 002020574607
That's ok happens to all of us.

3/21/2009 9:20:15 PM - 002021340986
My brain is not mush, it just wandered into the world of "reality" for a moment. I forgot where I was living...

3/11/2009 12:40:56 AM - 002021340986
I like the bottom right hand picture. She looks like her grandmother!

3/8/2009 12:15:02 AM - 002021340986
How did the bee expedition go? Minimal or maximum swelling?

3/8/2009 12:14:12 AM - 002021340986
I love the new pictures. They change soo much so quickly.

3/4/2009 1:10:22 AM - 002020574607
Pfffttttttt if someone told you I was at the high school ...check and see what's in their thermos! I did NOT visit the high school. I did email Michelle Cassie's picture in January. lol...could be the same thing. I haven't been on much and i miss our gabs. I must start making time for them again. I haven't even hit your gripe page today. Why am I the only one who gripes with you? Ok ask no more. I know. Be back on my hill tomorrow sometime. Then Mom and baby come to stay with us while the dumbo Dads take a bee hive out of the side of the house. The dam thing has split and Sean is allergic to them. I see this ending up in the emergency room Saturday night. Idiots!

3/3/2009 11:13:03 PM - 002021340986
You have left our planet and gone to baby world. I miss you. And I heard you visited the HS the other day and ignored my sad little self in Dalton. What is that all about??? :)

2/2/2009 11:24:31 PM - 002020574607
Do you have any idea how long I had to stand there to get the smile picture? lol....then just like every other kid who likes to mess with you ...she stuck her hand in front of her face. That's ok I'll get more!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1/30/2009 10:47:18 PM - 002021340986
New pictures-Hurray! I was beginning to think you were a bad grandma! :)

1/10/2009 12:35:38 AM - 002021340986
Thought you might want to know some of the latest.
Becky Strain is also a grandma. (No more info yet, born recently)
Terri Humberstone is a grandma. (Kelly- a boy - born New Year's Day)
Collete Kelly is a mom (adopted her - Cassandra - born Christmas day)
Sharon Pendleton says hi and that she misses you.

Over and out!

1/6/2009 1:46:00 AM - 002021340986
She really is beautiful. Who could ask for anything more?
and the dog looks cute too!

12/30/2008 3:27:25 AM - 001068341244
Congratulations grandma! I'm so happy for you! The pictures are great!

12/29/2008 1:34:42 AM - 002021340986
She is soooo beautiful!!!
Hope mom is doing okay and dad looks pretty happy? Where is grandma in all this??

12/19/2008 3:21:29 PM - 002020574607

no no no no.....I just realized my page looks different on my laptop. I've lost it completely now. My brain is officially fried. Sad

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......must bake! Meatball cookies today!

12/19/2008 3:03:36 PM - 002021340986
Your page is red because that is the background you have chosen.
You are forgiven for ignoring me. Thanks for the chatty note. I periodically feel so alone in Dalton because I am the "new" kid.

12/19/2008 2:24:37 AM - 002020574607
Why is my page red?

12/19/2008 1:24:08 AM - 002021340986
Where, oh where have my shutterfly friends gone?
Oh where, oh where could they be?

Do I smell bad? Do you have smellavision on your computer and I don't know it, and I am stinky???

Converse with me!

12/11/2008 1:27:19 AM - 002021340986
Are you there Carol? It's me, Margaret.

11/17/2008 10:42:28 AM - 002021340986
Did you see the article in the paper Saturday about fairy gardens? I thought of you and your backyard wilderness. I will send it to you if you give me your address.

11/9/2008 7:25:45 PM - 002021340986
Hey, you are only allowed one or two days with nothing to say. I can't believe you have no comments about life for me.

11/8/2008 1:40:16 PM - 001068341244

Hi Carol,

Sorry it has been so long and I've been out of touch. We lost our boxer, Mac, this week -- she had a severe heart problem and we had to put her down. I'm just devastated and having a hard time, so I've just been trying to feel it and do what I need to do. I'll resurface soon. I hope all is well with you.

10/29/2008 11:04:00 PM - 002021340986
I'm all about the village. I wouldn't have lasted as long in the crazy jobs I've held if I didn't! I do think mom dropped the ball, she needed to be proactive. I do have an issue with the fact that no one noticed she still couldn't comprehend English when they sent her to the alternative school. Or could she and now it is a convenient excuse to make her the darling of the media?
I agree, not enough information, just enough to make the average reader angry.

10/29/2008 3:06:28 PM - 002020574607

I certainly would try all I could to assimilate into a new culture as an adult. When we look at the time span the child has been here what I'm saying is, somebody missed the boat and it's not the child. Be it Mom or the school, neighbors, store clerks, church, or the country. I believe children get their values, work ethic, determination and the rest of the stuff we try every day to shove down their throats hoping it will stick, from home first, as well as the environment they live in. I also, in my naiveté or what ever it is...yea here goes Pollyanna again.....believe in the "village" approach. I don't know, I just think there's much more to this story than we are being told and that's the part of media that P^%es me off. Lordy it feels good to be back to interesting conversation.

10/28/2008 10:51:46 PM - 002021340986
Carol,
The girl in the article was Spanish speaking. She had lived in the US for several years by the minimal descriptions in the article. It was only in the last 2 years that she was not getting services. Until then, she had been receiving them.
I agree with the culture piece, but if you moved to another country for a stay of more than a week or month, wouldn't you make every effort to learn the native language? I would! That is my issue. Help yourself! That is what the original immigrants did. Learned on their own, went out and found what they needed to be successful. I just get tired of the schools and teachers getting the rap for what used to be a parent's job.

So nice to have you home. Ethel missed you!

10/27/2008 12:47:58 PM - 002020574607
Lucyyyyyyyyyyy I'm hoooommme!

10/20/2008 12:22:19 AM - 002021340986
I am so happy you are getting quality time with the family, but I am jealous because I am missing my Serenity! I am feeling neglected by my favorite optimist [;)]

10/5/2008 12:09:35 AM - 002021340986
I would pit your squirrels against Sarah and bet on them to win anyday!!! Even though she knows how to shoot a gun! She's not as smart as the squirrels!

10/4/2008 12:30:40 PM - 002020574607
lol l know a hockey mom and they are scary! Nah I would have sent my squirrels after them.

10/4/2008 12:24:23 AM - 001068341244
I miss you...you haven't been kidnapped by a hockey mom with a 6 pack...have you?!!!

10/1/2008 12:18:42 PM - 002020574607
lolol...... no I didn't mean aliens. But that would make sense and answer a lot of questions.

10/1/2008 1:24:05 AM - 002021340986
I think Bill was, is and will always be a good old boy in many ways. A good southern boy looks people in the eye and works the crowd. Nothing wrong with that in my book. I don't think he was a snake in the grass, just a victim of the media frenzy of our modern world, which believes that nothing is sacred. It's not like he's the only one who ever did. Actually some of our best were the biggest philanderers.
I digress. I think Obama truly believes what he is saying. I don't know if he can actually accomplish much against the machine that has become our political system, but the fact he wants to try and put himself out there, that impresses me. And that he is doing it in a way that is not offensive, with little mud flinging and posturing. It works for me, like opening the windows after a long winter.

Plus I love Joe Biden.

10/1/2008 1:10:39 AM - 002021340986
So, JM is being controlled by the aliens? Should we call for Mulder and Scully? That's what I feel like after watching the news, like I live on an alien planet. Who are these people and why are they inhabiting my planet? Go back from whence ye came! Out damned spot!!

9/29/2008 11:38:44 PM - 001068341244
I can see what you're saying about that former president, but what I saw from Obama was less public speaking 101 and closer to as genuine and concerned and engaging as a politician can get. I'm not an Obama bandwagoner, but I am starting to feel a shift within myself about his ability to see the need for and enact change. Apart from Clinton's moral indiscretion, I never really had a huge problem with his politics, and yes, I am one of those people who can separate his political career from his private life. But back to the debate, I turned off the television feeling like McCain thought it was just a silly formality while Obama knew it was an important stepping stone in this race that he could lose. That's just me though...what I'm excited for is the VP debate, I think that's going to be one huge hot mess no matter how you look at it...Biden can't win it because he's debating an idiot woman and Palin can't win it because she's, well.....an idiot.

9/25/2008 12:13:04 AM - 002021340986
I love you for your honesty!

9/16/2008 9:33:01 PM - 002021340986
Okay, I didn't go. I would have to keep switching back and forth to remember what I was talking about.
I have my mom's old Singer. It is a great machine, I am just incompetent and challenged when using it. I am hoping I can get her to give me some tutorials once football season is over.
I already am pretty much legally blind. My glasses prescription could blind a person with 20/20 vision just by putting them on. In fact, the eye doctor said I am almost past the point of laser surgery. Not enough left to work with. So I would be able to see without sticking things in my eyes every morning. Even Better!!
Although I always had a bit of a thing about Helen Keller too. Read everything I could get my hands on for a while. I have some weird compulsion to research women on the fringe. Imagine that...because I am totally mainstream. NOT!!!
This is weird conversing here. We need to head back to Erin. See you there.

9/16/2008 9:28:35 PM - 002021340986
You are right! Why are we conversing here? I am going to Erin's site to finish the conversation!

9/16/2008 1:05:39 PM - 002020574607
As for the sewing machine. Go the big bucks. You'll never regret it. Ok I had to look up doppelganger. Will you have to go blind first? Because if you do that's gonna mess with the sewing thing which will take us to Helen Keller and that whole mess. Hey, shouldn't we be having this conversation at Erin's?

9/15/2008 9:26:50 PM - 002021340986
Thanks for the Laura comparison. I have never given up the desire to be her. Someday I will learn to work the sewing machine, and then we will all be in trouble!
And if the book thing ever happens, I will be her doppleganger! Whoop! Whoop!

9/15/2008 7:57:43 PM - 002020574607
Oh dear Peggy I was hither at yon court house. Sitting on planks waiting to see if they would need my assistance. Which of course they didn't , never called me. Now I have a huge arse ache and no place to go. Sighhhhhhhh! Endangering the welfare of a child......not ONE perspective juror asked what the definition of a "child" is. Brilliant bunch. Hmmmm lets see, had to check the box that asked if I had testified in a court before. What was the case? Child abuse. Oh, OK, thanks for your time .....bye! I shall return! Tom C was there and got the boot. Gee wonder why? Do you suppose a 20 something might be a little nercvous about a teacher on his jury? Could be. Couldn't hear half of what was being said so that was nice.
.............Nah, she doesn't sceer me!

9/15/2008 5:26:31 PM - 002021340986
Carol, Carol, where art thou? Did Erin scare you off with threats of rent? You know she would never charge us, where would she go for entertainment?

9/10/2008 7:53:14 PM - 002021340986
I am thinking good thoughts for you, adding you to my daily prayers, and missing our conversations on Voglerville.

9/8/2008 10:19:40 AM - 002021340986
Finally made the muffins yesterday. Actually Mary made them and they were lovely. We only had one egg casualty also!

9/7/2008 10:37:16 PM - 002020574607
Oh my dear don't try to figure us out. Just be one with us. ohhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..............

9/7/2008 2:41:49 PM - 001068341244
I really don't know about you two...but I love you because of your insanity, not in spite of it!!!!

9/7/2008 12:22:13 AM - 002021340986
I can't think of anyone who wouldn't thrive and revel in our company! Smiling

9/6/2008 3:22:19 PM - 002020574607
Thank God. I can finally look forward to getting up in the morning. Now if I can just get those apron patterns delivered I will add to her joys of knowing us. Who wouldn't be thrilled to have us around? (Ok so a lot of people but let's not go there.)

9/6/2008 11:55:25 AM - 002021340986
voglerville is back!!!!!

9/4/2008 1:22:54 PM - 002020574607

Enjoy those muffins.
Leah, are you going to start a page? You have some great pictures to post. After all you do have the cutest baby around. I got Cassidy's sleeper almost finished yesterday. I just have to figure out what appliqué I want to put on it and the towel is next on my agenda. I'm looking for fish to put on the towel. I love this stuff!

9/4/2008 10:17:32 AM - 002021340986
The muffins were postponed due to the arrival of a box with digital cameras from adopted Auntie Hope. (My cosmic twin - yes there is another one of me out there, and if you think I am outspoken and opinionated, you should meet Hope) She is always upstaging me, but they spent the afternoon clicking pics of Barbie families and the cat. So we are hoping to bake them tonight. A little cooler tonight also.

8/30/2008 11:15:05 PM - 002021340986
I love my Barbie made simple! One of my favorite gifts as a child was one Christmas my great aunts made me a Barbie wardrobe. I mean wardrobe! I had hand knit fair isle cardigans with matching knit skirts, ball gowns, pants suits, Jackie O sundresses, everything! It was awesome! I still have many of the clothes they made. They even made Ken a fake snakeskin coat. That is one of my goals this winter, learn how to sew. I have mom's old Singer. I need her to check it because I messed up the stitches somehow, but that is an easy fix.

8/29/2008 7:11:33 PM - 002021340986
I am so excited! I am headed to Dalton this year to do the tech TA stuff. No HS drama this year - HURRAY!!! A chance to enjoy kids who don't have cell phones attached to their hands, don't swear all the time, and costumes at Halloween! I can't wait! Yes

8/29/2008 2:44:35 PM - 002020574607

So glad to hear you have not been taken away. Is this the last one to go to college? I bet the convention is a riot. I hear they hire the left-overs from The David Letterman Show. Do you suppose it's true? I love the promises since almost all of what "they" say they will do is totally impossible without congressional approval. Ah well they have fun. I think you should run for office on the "Good Food Lovers" ticket.

8/29/2008 2:34:56 PM - 001068341244
I have not been kidnapped by a group of rogue golfers, I was helping my sister move in at college. That...and being glued to the Democratic Convention and CNN...if nothing else, this time of year reminds me of how many ways BS can be manufactured and delivered to the masses. It's the best comedy out there.

8/26/2008 1:47:26 PM - 002021340986
I don't have a real salsa recipe, I make it up as I go along. I will try to write down key ingredients this year for you.

8/23/2008 7:12:10 PM - 002021340986
So your leaving me alone in my crazy front page rants. Thanks!!! I refuse to bend and move mine. Welcome to me in all my insanity, indignation, and loud-mouthiness. (is that a word?)
I am returning the thanks. I just caught up on everyone, having been to the beach for a few days and dealing with reformed teenagers when I returned. Not really dealing, just watching and waiting...knowing teenagers as well as I do. So, thank you for the compliment. I love being devil's advocate and love that you appreciate that quality in me. Not everyone does. Why, I don't know, I think it is a stellar characteristic to have.
I told Erin one day how much I had enjoyed getting to know you even more through the website. Now I want you to know how jealous I am that you are continuing your retirement journey and I am wondering how to get the salsa made, the peppers frozen, the peaches canned, and the herbs dried in the next week and a half. Plus I have to go school shopping with the family. And see Clone Wars. Where did my summer go??????????????????

8/20/2008 11:59:45 AM - 001068341244
I too love the Olympics...it makes me want to go out and accomplish dynamic feats of athletic prowess...and then I get tired from all that desire and sit back down with a book. But...I do love it and I am reminded about the power of being able to compete...you know me...love that competition!

8/10/2008 10:19:21 PM - 002021340986
Thanks for the help with the flowers - I was completely unsure of the correct color terminology... :-)
You would love the gardens at Mumford, but you would have to come down off the mountain to see them. I also was remembering T. Jefferson's gardens at Monticello. I have a book about them, I will see what he says about shade flowers.

8/8/2008 4:43:46 PM - 002020574607
Boy you have nailed me right. All talk and no show. I'm not ignoring you honestly. Just trying to get the use of my car and my money together. So far they never come at the right time. Bill is using my car this week. I really am not complaining at least he's outta here. :) Appointment Thursday and that should be it. I promise to get back to you.

8/7/2008 1:51:20 PM - 001068341244
I know you're a hermit, but are you going to let me know about one of these days that you venture up here! I don't want to be pushy, but it would be fun to shop/eat together or just get together and find somewhere to marvel over kitchen gadgets! Whatever...you know me, I'm not picky! And yes, it's August and the boredom is coming to visit from time to time.

8/7/2008 12:03:01 PM - 002020574607

not sure this is legal but it is a good coupon

http://www.yankeecandle.com/yc/html/retail/Email_HTML/webCoupon_XF808W1.html

8/6/2008 6:11:49 PM - 001068341244

1. fried is always better

2. I'm a full apron kind of girl!

3. Have fun on your journey! Take lots of pics so I can learn from you!

4. I'm so happy you found cast iron that can double as a weapon if necessary!

8/6/2008 1:11:41 PM - 002020574607
Thanks. I'm off on my journey. I bet I could do the same thing you did with the tomatoes. I'm thinking I might not like it mushed. Fried must be better. :)

8/6/2008 1:05:31 PM - 001068341244

To get you started with the patty pan, check out this link

http://twicebloomed.blogspot.com/2007/06/patty-pan-squash-recipes.html

I just googled patty pan squash recipes and a ton of ideas came up! I saw one for stuffed patty pan with white beans....that could be delicious! Let me know how your search and cooking goes! I've never used patty pan!

8/5/2008 8:34:58 PM - 002020574607
Me obcessive? lolol..........ok I'll try. Well, I didn't bleach it yet. Does that count? Can't promise anything. I can't talk about the trip to the city. The Grandpa bench was loaded. Let's just say Joann's had tons of stuff on sale and I stood in line for over 30 mins with all registers open. I'll be busy.

8/5/2008 5:47:16 PM - 002021340986
Stop being so obsessive about cleaning your computer. Clean it once a month or so and it will be fine. I have 2 kids who live on Disney and Lego, cookiepalooza, and I only clean every few months.
Enjoy Joann's and Wegmans. No better way to spend a day!

8/3/2008 3:09:32 PM - 002020574607
Thanks so much. I love that I know you are stopping by.

8/2/2008 3:15:39 PM - 002021821433
I was away and I was glad to get back and get caught up on your sight. You missed your calling. You should have been a writer. I check you out every day. I love it!!! Go away!!! Money gets moldy(sp???) in storage!!!! Your pictures are great too.

8/1/2008 4:49:59 PM - 001068341244
I'm so happy you're back...I've missed you!!!

8/1/2008 2:56:50 PM - 002021340986
I am now commenting on your page!

7/29/2008 9:11:08 PM - 001068341244
I hope you get your computer woes figured out!!!!

7/24/2008 12:36:35 PM - 002021340986
Where are you? Has the granddog captured you and buried you with the bones next to Stella????

7/21/2008 3:13:42 PM - 001068341244
I have not been kidnapped and the market day was awesome. My parents loved it too...I think that they will be making the trek up more often. On that note...if you want to come up on a Thursday or Saturday to go to the market, let me know...I'd meet you there! I'm always looking for a reason to go!

7/19/2008 10:35:23 AM - 002021340986
I think Stella will be much happier where she is. I can send a care package of clay for her, my roses seem to love it. I just gave them another buzz cut - second this season!

7/18/2008 2:27:02 PM - 002021340986
I love your site Carol and will be visiting for your words of wisdom in my "Keshesense" filled world.
Peggy

7/15/2008 12:26:01 AM - 001068341244
I'm so glad you started a site too!!! Now I can keep track of your goings on!!! I love it so far!!! Can't wait for our shopping time!

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